00:00:05 Welcome to tonight's Saturday Night Special with Joe Schum from Soul Patch Hippo here on the inspired stewardship podcast I'm Joe, some from Soul Patch Hippo Success coaching. I want a surgery journey to be the next version of you to be inspired to become the most authentic. You listen to this, the inspired stewardship podcast by my friend Scott Maderer every day can help you keep the focus that you need. Part of it is just this long term what you call etiquette that we've been raised up in. The talks about that give wonderful concepts around being self lift that we people that have grown up through,
00:00:57 you know, whether it's been a hard life or spend a good one. We understand what it's like to reach out and serve someone else. Welcome and thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship. Podcasts. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling in the inspired stewardship Podcast will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others and develop your influence so that you can impact the way and tonight,
00:01:39 Saturday Night Special Joe and I talk with you about coaching and being coached to become the you that you want to be. Joe also shares how he's seen folks focus too much on the outcome and not enough on the process and what you can do about it and lots more. No one area that a lot of folks need some help with is around the area of productivity. Getting not just Maur things done, but actually getting the right things done can be really, really tough. I've got a course called Productivity for your passion that's designed to help you do this.
00:02:21 And then they hold you accountable and walk with you so that you can tailor productivity not just to be getting more done but actually getting the right things done. What's more, we take the approach of looking at your personality and how you actually look at things in the world and Taylor the productivity system to your personality, because the truth is, a lot of the systems that are out there are written really well for somebody with a particular personality type. But if you have a different approach to things. They just don't work.
00:02:55 But there's tools and techniques and approaches that you can take that will work for anyone, and we help you do that in productivity for your passion. Check it out over at inspired stewardship dot com slash launch. Joe Schum is a certified coach and trainer from Soul Patch Hippo. Success Coaching after 30 plus years of sales and marketing efforts and Tech medical and the financial service is plus running several businesses in and around real estate. Joe shifted from the corporate world to coaching because he's on a quest to shift the conversation to be more human.
00:03:41 Then what is currently experienced in corporate America, Joe focuses on connecting with people and focusing on them, not the thing between them as the only way to establish trust fine answers for yourself and be held accountable to make the changes necessary to move forward to the next version of who you want to become. Joe, Welcome to the show. Oh, my God. That's a big shoes to fill. You gotta live up to that. Yeah, you got me nervous. Ah, it's great to see you, Joe.
00:04:19 Um, yeah. You know, as a fellow coach. I know you're familiar with ways that folks often you know, they don't understand yet what coaching is. It's still a relatively new thing, even though technically it's been around since the 18 hundreds and a lot of people's heads, it's still relatively okay, So would you share a little bit about what you see through your business as the main benefits and challenges that come around coaching? Yeah, that's Ah, it's a great question in and of itself. Could be its own session.
00:04:57 And I guess it's looking benefits first. What really turned me on to coaching and I fell into coaching from a couple of you know, those those weird moments. The triangulation is you and I have chatted about before it, and my wife had experienced some coaching, and I got asked in on a couple of things that participates of exercises. Very fascinated by it. I was also introduced to another coach who is a very accomplished coach and friend and, you know, guided me along the way, and I started to see the value of this.
00:05:29 The value was this, that it's so much better when we determine the answers for ourselves what challenges us then, when the answers were given to us and the coaching process, in its purest form, does just that. And I was just so captivated by that and the uncanny ability for things to work out for you because you have connected or as we say, resonated with that answer because it came from inside you. And the challenges that I see Scott are the definition of coach, and it's a really highly used word right now.
00:06:10 And everybody wants to be a coach. Is the new buzzword, right? And so sometimes it means consultant. Sometimes it needs mentor. Sometimes it's appropriately or inappropriately therapy or therapists and no Cathy, no aspersions on our certified therapy friend, therapist. And sometimes it just means coach, which is that which is, you know, the answers lie within you when we focus on you as, uh, resourceful and creative and whole and the actors do lie within you well and again. I mean, and we've talked about this before.
00:06:47 If you think about that coaching continuum with kind of pure coaching at one end, and you know that drawing answers, using questions and exercises and activities to draw things out of folks and then, you know, kind of going all the way to the other end, which is kind of the more than mentorship or the are the consulting kind of model. It's not that consulting is bad and coaching is good. It's just they serve different purposes, you know? Yeah, yeah, fine. Follow different tracks. Or like,
00:07:15 a process. Yeah, and they have different roles, and they may be used, you know, same thing for therapy. You know, I tell people all the time. I'm like, I love ice and clients to therapist at times because that that's needed. You know, it's it's not my forte. I need to go to a different place. So, um, so that kind of idea of looking at coaching and falling into it through kind of doing it yourself, Um, and with your wife and with other activities,
00:07:44 What you know now that you've kind of moved into it is your own business model. What are some of the challenges you see that clients have with, you know, let's assume they understand what coaching is, but we're working through the process themselves. Yeah, so once you've helped them define what their experience is about to be and you do engage with a client. Um, it's the two challenges are one is for the both of us, which is to quickly establish trust so that the more common challenge that comes up candor or honesty,
00:08:23 bravery or courage is allowed to come forth. Um, so that people don't think so much about the doing peace. Oh, Joe, or my coach is going to tell me what to do next or is going to give you a bunch of exercises in Homer, but also the other thing. That the sort of the toe piece of it or the being teach. So that's where I find someone's either really big Duer or really big sort of beer be, and the other half of them is the half that's holding them back.
00:08:56 And then can we can we get them to recognize that and bring it up to the level of the other? And then there's connectivity and the opportunity to fall it. So from that's from the individual side. But trump from the from the ultimately, from the just the engagement itself. I really think it can we get into a trusting situation right away. Fastest possible so that we can just get in tow, OK? Yeah, and kind of speaking of that, I I love the way you call that out.
00:09:25 The idea of, you know, sudden, some of us are more do, er some of sort of more beers. And really and truly, it's getting those into alignment. A lot of times is really what brings the synergy and brings the energy toe what we're doing, because I I will admit I've been guilty of both of those at different points in my life's doing doing too much and being that, Yeah, it's true for us is true for everybody. And so, you know, I figured who was said We're human beings,
00:09:54 not human doing right? And so we want to connect to that. I do find it more than being side that gets ignored or sort of part because humans we you know, we've got to accomplish stuff, keep moving forward. And so, by doing stuff we get, we get the chalk, check it off of our list and relax all kinds of other beauty that we've missed in the process of getting the check so that this kind of goes along that lines. I think you know Ah, lot of us can resonate with that.
00:10:28 So if if you've ever kind of held yourself back from being able to do what you want to become, being able to be what you want to become and I deliberately using both of those words because it could be either one. You know, I think we get in our own way. Ah, and that's really kind of what you're talking about. That and how are some of the ways you seen clients do that get in their own way from becoming that ideal version of themselves? That's kind of your part of your messaging is becoming the next you that you want to be.
00:11:03 How have you Some people kind of hold themselves back from that. Yeah. I love the way you connected that. Yes, it is something that I would want for my client could become the next version of themselves. And, uh, I think that what is the hold them back. Iss. Um, in some cases, it's fear Ah, the ah, the fear of change. Because change is hard and change means that their spin it you're gonna experience most likely some failure And, you know, just working with some young male professionals before our interview today and challenge them to say is that fear pays the path to success and that you know that that that is a huge stumbling block for a lot of us.
00:11:51 It's like, Oh, my God, what if I make a mistake? Yes, you're either gonna make it or you're not.
00:11:57 Now that you know the possible outcomes, there's only two answers. How do you feel? So I feel pretty good.
00:12:03 I know the answers that can kind of know the future. All right, so let's step in and find out what they're.
00:12:08 So I see here is the first piece, and I asked Lucy, like especially with men there is the protector.
00:12:16 You know that that that sort of that quote, head of the household sort of persona. And that's a challenge for us as men.
00:12:23 I know you coach a lot of men as well in that, um, they put everybody else in front of them,
00:12:30 and it's what we've been taught, right? You know, we're here to put family, Children spouse Ah,
00:12:37 uh, friends first. And then we we get to eat last and It's another concept of perspective that I run to quite a bit when I tried to introduce him into a quote Selfish state,
00:12:51 which is the word itself makes people cringe. Western society. And they say that, Hey, you know,
00:13:00 you want to show up differently, bigger and better for the people that you care about. Then you have to take care of yourself and you have to invest in yourself.
00:13:10 And you have thio make yourself bigger and better open yourself up to change because then don't notice that. And that which is probably the third biggest challenges,
00:13:21 is just the investment Self Scott, which is people, and it sort of duck tales after what I just said,
00:13:26 which is, People spend money to stroke a check for themselves. Get to that place is just some cases foreign.
00:13:35 They want this for themselves, and then you say, Well, you know, now it's time for the money fire and they go,
00:13:42 Oh, let me get back to you or I'm gonna check with my spouse or I'm going to go think this over.
00:13:47 And now they've been asked to put themselves first. And the sense when they say no to that they put themselves at the back of the wild.
00:13:57 Well, well, it is a time commitment to It's not just even the money, because it's a process.
00:14:04 You know, the coaching group that I'm part of, we have an expression on. We've actually kind of turned it into our own internal drinking game.
00:14:11 Anytime anyone says it, we all take a drink. You know, it's kind of fun, you know,
00:14:15 most of the time it's water, but still, you know, it's the idea. And that is it's a process,
00:14:20 not an event, you know. And the truth is, I think in our culture, a lot of times we're looking for the event.
00:14:26 You know, we're looking for the quick fix. Can't you just sit down with me for 30 minutes and you'll fix all my problems and I'll move on to the next thing?
00:14:33 And you know, we're good to go, right? I mean, surely it's that easy, right?
00:14:36 And you know, you didn't get your magic wand when you got your coaching certificate, either, right?
00:14:42 You know me once, e. I love what you said that if that happens more often than anything,
00:14:51 if you get on the phone Lee. Right now, Er I really have a chance. We just spend 30 minutes.
00:14:57 And you You think yourself well, like anything else. You know, you could think about muscle memorization.
00:15:02 You think about guys like Malcolm Gladwell. You're the Beetle that took him 10,000 hours to become that good.
00:15:08 It's the same with poaching. It just doesn't happen after 30 minutes, even after one or two sessions start to feel good,
00:15:14 like, Wow, I'm really focused on that. I don't need this anymore. And guess what? Those habits that have been grooved into us,
00:15:21 whether they're emotional habits or spiritual habits or financial habits or health and wellness, have it. They've been their groups and they don't ever go away.
00:15:32 We're just trying to set new grooves for you to travel. And yes, I'm glad you brought up.
00:15:38 It's not just about the money is currency. It's time. Family, you know, energy. Well,
00:15:46 emotion, ocean, all good, you know. And you talked a little bit about the fear of change,
00:15:53 of the kind of the fear of failure and the selfishness mentality of, you know, having to be a little selfish.
00:16:02 It's interesting, because again, when I'm working with other other folks who are, You know, I work with the low small business folks that air in that early stage.
00:16:09 They want to create their own business. But they're not there yet. You know, they're still working corporate.
00:16:14 They're still working 9 to 5, but they've got a dream. I don't even know what it looks like yet.
00:16:19 And one of the things I tell him is, as you started to define this, you've gotta be selfish.
00:16:24 I mean, I use that exact language I'm like, and you because they'll tell me, you know,
00:16:28 I want to start a business that helps everybody. It does this, and I'm like, and that's all wonderful.
00:16:33 But what do you want it out of it for? You. You're right, man. And, yeah,
00:16:39 all of a sudden, that's like dead stop. It was like, I don't know, You know?
00:16:44 S Oh, it's the same sort of question. Yeah. No, that is true. That word can stop any conversation that you ask someone to be that just part of it is just this long term,
00:16:59 you'll call etiquette that we've been raised up in the talks about You have a wonderful concepts around being selfless,
00:17:07 that we as as people that have grown up to, ah, you know, whether it's been a hard life or it's been a good one.
00:17:15 We understand what it's like to reach out and serve someone else. And so we get that. And if I am unhealthy in any way,
00:17:24 I'm a life out of balance. It doesn't show up the same way as if I'm coming to you with something where I'm confident that I'm in.
00:17:34 I'm in a good bounce. Can't procreate with you. That's yeah, and I love you. Thank you for bringing up the co create work because I know that's what you know,
00:17:45 we've talked about. We've had this conversation and I want to have it today, where other folks can benefit from it.
00:17:51 Um, you know that. And I think it's important. Pull this out and make sure we kind of put a nail in this.
00:17:57 The selfishness that we're talking about isn't the selfishness that has a has that bad name. Yeah, it's almost like we need another word,
00:18:07 you know, and I don't know what the word is. What we need. Another word, because what we've labeled a selfishness is really Maur kind of its self centeredness.
00:18:17 You know, it's putting yourself and your own needs at the center of the universe and therefore sacrificing everyone else.
00:18:23 You know, I'm the only one on the planet, Um, my family, we have a joke.
00:18:27 When someone does something kind of self centered in front of us, we say, Oh, it's just brain damage caused from the hole in the top of their head where the axis of the earth runs through it,
00:18:35 you know, because they're the center of the universe, right? That's how they get a picture of themselves.
00:18:39 And that's just our our internal language of labeling that we laugh and we move on keeps us from getting mad because it's so easy to get mad when somebody does that.
00:18:49 And but we're not talking about that. We're talking about a different kind of selfishness. Can you kind of expand on that a little bit?
00:18:56 What? What's the dance? Yeah, So, uh, and I'm glad I'm glad we dug into this a little bit more.
00:19:04 Some of my mentor coaches and instructor coaches well, lean into the term self care a cz well, and so I think we all can almost merged to to what you're talking about,
00:19:16 what I'm talking about and I will get self care perspective. It does take intention to say I'm going to do this for me,
00:19:27 for these reasons and this is what the benefit for me will be and ultimately for the person that encounters me Once I achieved this right eso in business.
00:19:39 Sometimes we say you have B to B and B to B C right business, the business and business.
00:19:45 It is consumer, and you say, Well, I focus on my client and really, my client's clung.
00:19:52 So I challenged those that are looking at investing in themselves to not only look at what it will do for them,
00:19:58 but what will do for their client being those around them and what they're going to experience when he evolved or shifted Person is shows up.
00:20:10 You know, I I think it does. I mean, Thio to say it back. In other words,
00:20:17 just echo. It's this idea of of recognizing that to really take care of other people, you've got to be operating from a place of strength,