Join us today for the Saturday Night Special with Patrick Antonucci from Dad Hackers...
In tonight’s 36th Saturday Night Special Patrick Antonucci and I talk about becoming a Christian as a journey. I also talk with him about how you can become a present father in your relationships. Then Patrick and I share with you what you need to focus on to improve yourself as a man and lot’s more.
Join in on the Chat below.
00:00:00 Welcome to tonight's Saturday Night special with Patrick and a New Sea from Dad. Hackers here on the inspired stewardship podcast I'm Patrick Antonucci from Dad Hackers, and I challenge you to become the man that you were called in created to be one way to be inspired. To do this is to listen to this show. The inspired stewardship podcast with my friend Scott made her number two leading their Children to award. A lot of guys really want to leave their Children to the Lord and raise them. According to Ephesians, Chapter six Fathers not provoke your Children toe anger,
00:00:50 but bring them up in the discipline and instruction award. They want to do that, and they're concerned for the eternal state of their childhood. They're not 100% sure what to do besides bring in the church. Welcome and thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship. Podcasts. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling in. The inspired Georgia podcast will learn to invest in yourself,
00:01:21 invest in others and develop your influence so that you can impact the world. In tonight's 36 Saturday night special, Patrick and two new C and I talked about becoming a Christian as a journey. How you can become a present father in your relationships, what you need to focus on to improve yourself as a man and lots more. No one area that a lot of folks need some help with is around the area of productivity. Getting not just Maur things done, but actually getting the right things done can be really,
00:02:02 really tough. I've got a course called Productivity for your passion that's designed to help you do this. And then they hold you accountable and walk with you so that you can tailor productivity not just to be getting more done but actually getting the right things done. What's more, we take the approach of looking at your personality and how you actually look at things in the world and Taylor the productivity system to your personality, because the truth is, a lot of the systems that are out there are written really well for somebody with a particular personality type.
00:02:39 But if you have a different approach to things they just don't work. But there's tools and techniques and approaches that you can take that will work for anyone, and we help you do that and productivity for your passion. Check it out over at inspired stewardship dot com slash launch Patrick Antonucci is the founder and host of the Dad Hackers Community and the Dad Hackers Podcast. You know, Patrick didn't grow up in a Christian home, and yet now he finds himself married with five kids. Wow! On striving to lead his family,
00:03:18 as God intended men to do. You know, he's a father of an only child, I can't imagine five. So just plays my mind. Yeah, and sitting down instead of waiting for someone to come along and show him what to do, which is what so many of us do. He actually started on a personal and spiritual development journey, setting out to become the husband, the father and the leader in his home that God designed him to be course. He started this journey with what I recommend that everybody start with with just prayer.
00:03:52 While he was still young, he ended up God cinema Wife God sent his Children, and Patrick did all of the things that you're supposed to do. You read the books he attended workshops, listen to sermons, just trying to grasp what is it that God designed him to be. And in 2018 Patrick made a decision and took massive action founding dad hackers. His first step was he started a Facebook group, and he began to just try to gather like minded men together into that group. Later he added a podcast,
00:04:24 and now he also has added the Ironmen mastermind group. His vision for dad hackers is twofold. First, it's part of Patrick's own journey to become gods. Man, you've heard me talk about this podcast is part of my journey as well. And sometimes I preaching to the choir, putting out the podcast episode that I need to hear and you don't just get to listen in. And I think Patrick does the same thing. It's his way to surround himself with other godly men who have similar aspirations. And then,
00:04:55 secondly, Patrick's desire is to bring as many other men along with him on this journey and create a movement of spirit empowered, been on a mission for God. Patrick and his wife Jessica lived near Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, with their five Children. And while we're recording this, we're in the mid midst of the cove. It 19. So they're all their homes, which for me would blow my mind because I don't I don't like that many people around me, but you all seem to be dealing with. Well,
00:05:24 Patrick Patrick, welcome to the show. Yeah, thank you so much, Scott. I appreciate you having me on the show, and it's funny how you said Patrick finds himself married with fine five kids. It's like I woke up one day and like just there. But no, that's that's not how it happens. And I know you. You pull that off of my, uh, my one sheet there, but, um, it's funny when you when you write something and then you hear somebody else say it,
00:05:53 you're like, Oh, that that could be taking a little bit differently. But I mean, of course. I mean, you found them along the journey, right? Right. It's all part of the journey. Yeah, so this is, you know, and kind of talking about that with the journey. You know, Patrick in the intro, we talked about the fact that you weren't raised in a Christian home. My journey I kind of was raised in a Christian home but then left the church for a number of years,
00:06:20 actually ran screaming from the church for a number of years is a little bit more accurate and then come back. Can you talk a little bit about that journey for you of, you know, not being raised with the Christian Foundation and then coming to it as you journey along in life? Sure. So when I was about five, my parents divorced. My mom left my dad, and at that time I didn't really understand all that was going on. I was five and they neither one of them where ultra spiritually or or deep into their faith.
00:06:56 At that point, my mom had grown up Catholic. She actually was going to go to school to become a nun, but ended up getting out of that and then married my dad and, um so I didn't have that foundation. And then when I was about 12 my mom began dating a guy and they started going to a local congregation in our area, and I I started going with them got exposed to the gospel, knew that I didn't want to go to hell on Heard the gospel message in the saving saving work of Christ and became a Christian when I was about 13 years old.
00:07:34 But there came a point when I was about 19 years old that I really got serious about my faith, and I think a lot of guys, this happens to them. You have almost like a life changing circumstance or situation that you're brought into. So not growing up in a Christian home. Not having a father that led me spiritually and disciple of me made me open and susceptible to the influence of kids around me and the culture. And so I started to, even though I became a Christian When I was about 13 years old,
00:08:12 I quickly was led astray and got involved in drugs and alcohol and all those things. And I had really night really rough night one night and, um, not gonna go into nitty gritty details or anything, but it was basically a wake up call when I was about 19 years old. I call it the time that God slap me upside the head and from that moment forward, I stopped all of that and really became intentional. With my faith, I read through the whole Bible I'd never read through it before I started going,
00:08:45 attending all the service's I could. And from that moment forward, God has kind of has blessed me and lead me along the way. It's not that I haven't had any challenges. It's not that I'm like, super richer, very prosperous and in that sense, But he he's continued to bless me as I've been been faithful to him. And so that's kind of the journey there in a nutshell. Now I'm gonna argue with you on something. I would say You are very rich. You just don't happen to have monetary wealth because those are two different things.
00:09:23 Right? And And I I would agree with you and, you know, living in America and a first World country exactly abundantly wealthy, even if you don't make seven figures a year or anything like that. Ah, but yes, I I am exceedingly blessed with the riches of Christ and the riches that come through. Um, Proverbs 31 Woman is a life and you know, my quiver full so to speak as my Children. So, yeah, I totally agree with you in that sense. The other thing that,
00:09:54 you know, I think for a lot of us a cz men especially will go through periods in our life. And it's really not just one. I mean, college is a common one. You're here about men having a midlife crisis and kind of leaving the church. And and historically, men are not necessarily church attenders. And this is a common problem. Ah, problem today. What? What would you say to men that are kind of hearing your journey and hearing that message? And maybe they're in that dark place right now and struggling with,
00:10:28 you know, understanding or believing that there is value and turning to God during that. What? What would you say toe toe a man that's dealing with that right now? That's an excellent question. I would say Number one, make sure you're connecting with God because he does exist and he is there also. If you are going through a struggle, God doesn't promise to remove the struggle from our lives. And there's a Michael Hyatt quote out there, and I'm gonna butcher the quote I'll paraphrase it,
00:11:03 but it's basically like when you go through a negative situation. The question you should be asking is, what does this make possible?
00:11:12 And that's kind of the mindset that we need to go through life with is even in that amid this Corona virus thing,
00:11:19 that's the question I'm asking. What does this make pots? Actually, that we're doing this interview right now is made possible by the Corona virus,
00:11:28 because normally I'd be working in a mop. So it it opened up the time for us to do that.
00:11:34 But for the men that are really struggling, I would say Follow that, prompting in your heart that is saying,
00:11:41 Reach out to God and I would also say, Get into God's word, particularly the gospels of Jesus Christ.
00:11:48 Matthew, Mark, Luke, John. A lot of people start in Genesis and are totally confused, or they get a big revelation.
00:11:55 And then they get to live a convicted in Leviticus and completely give up. Right? Right, right.
00:12:01 But, uh and we may talk about this later, but Jesus is the ultimate example of biblical masculinity.
00:12:08 And so reading about his life will really show you what it means to be a man and and how he faced adversity and how he confronted issues in his life.
00:12:18 And he confronted the religious leaders in the status quo of the day. And he did not back down.
00:12:25 And, um, he relied on his heavenly father and he relied on the Holy Spirit, and he surrounded himself with a band of brothers called the The Apostles.
00:12:34 You know, and we a lot of times we don't get that in the church. Um, I just interviewed a guy on my podcast,
00:12:44 and he wrote a book called Why Men Hate Going to Church in a nominal book. I don't know if you've ever read it,
00:12:51 but there's this over feminization of the church, particularly in Western culture, and it really turns guys off,
00:12:59 and it's unfortunately, it's a false message about what Christ is all about and what Christianity is all about.
00:13:05 It's really very masculine type of religion. It's just been overly feminized. Yeah, so kind of talking about that.
00:13:14 If if your father and you struggle with believing that you could be a good dad and that's one of the areas that Patrick really works and focuses on as men.
00:13:24 Being father has been being good dads. What would you share with, um, with men on being present as a father being in their family and a good,
00:13:36 positive way? What? What tips or advice would you give them? Sure, I'll start off with an illustration that just came to mind.
00:13:44 My son and I began working out together, lifting weights, and I did not start him off bench pressing £400.
00:13:54 I started him off with the bar in like, £5 and each week he'll go up incrementally. Or maybe not even it all.
00:14:03 You know, maybe maybe he struggled that week and needs to repeat that weight and same thing with myself.
00:14:08 I did not start off bench pressing for I've never been to £400 anyway. But it's incremental. And so take that illustration that if you're trying to become the dad,
00:14:21 maybe the dad you wish you had or the dad that God is calling you to be, it's not gonna happen all at once.
00:14:28 You have to focus on being purposeful and intentional and consistent in my life. The thing that I've found that works the best is adding a little bit and committing to that over the long haul.
00:14:41 And so you take small, little incremental changes over time results in the or adds up to, I should say,
00:14:50 adds up to the big result that we're looking for. So if you're not where you want to be,
00:14:55 is a dad today you're not going to get there tomorrow. But you can take a step and change your trajectory a little bit so that down the road you'll end up being where you want to be.
00:15:08 So what are the things some of the things that you know within the Dad hackers community? Um, I know you hear from a lot of men.
00:15:15 You've seen a lot of the interactions. What are some of the things that either men are struggling with right now around fatherhood or being a dad or and right now,
00:15:25 not necessarily being in the middle of code 19 though I think that honestly has kind of exasperated some of it and made it more obvious.
00:15:33 But what are some of the areas that men most struggle with? I think you'd agree with this one.
00:15:39 Number one is time. Is it all the commitments that are placed on the shoulders of men number two,
00:15:46 leading their Children to the Lord. A lot of guys really want to leave their Children to the Lord and raise them.
00:15:53 According to Ephesians, Chapter six. Fathers do not provoke your Children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
00:16:02 They want to do that, and they're concerned for the eternal state of their child. But they're not 100% sure what to do besides bring him the church.
00:16:12 So those were some some of the things that come up a lot with men between the time issue and also raising their kids.
00:16:23 Right, if you will, right and well. And of course, you know, when you look at culture and and surround yourself with community Ah,
00:16:32 you turn on TV, you know, turn on any sitcom for more than 30 minutes, and I get very upset because the dad is always the joke from her at least 90% of the time.
00:16:44 That ad is the joke or completely oblivious to what's going on. Yeah, it's their punch line, as opposed to you a father.
00:16:54 And so I do also think one of the problems that we struggle with is, you know, other than going back to the Bob Bible,
00:17:00 it's hard to find the good examples. Um, which is one of the reasons that you know, the dad hacker community that you've put together bringing men together so that we can lean on each other and say,
00:17:10 Hey, here's what I did You know her or here's what I did and it wasn't good, did Don't do that,
00:17:16 you know kind of thing. And at least learn from other men. Um is good. Speaking of learning from other men,
00:17:23 one of the things that I mentioned in the intro to is you started the Ironman Mastermind, which is a group for men on that journey.
00:17:31 Uh, where you actually bring them in together in a mastermind kind of activity. Can you talk a bit more about you?
00:17:37 What is the benefit from surrounding ourselves with other men? What's the benefit specifically of masterminds? A CZ well,
00:17:45 with when you're on that journey? Sure that that's a really good question in a subject that's really near and dear to my heart.
00:17:53 Of course. Ironmen The name Ironman mastermind came from proverbs 27 17 which says this iron sharpens iron so one man sharpens a number another.
00:18:03 And that's our. Our theme verse is that we want to sharpen one another. And another thing that comes to mind well,
00:18:11 let me back up a step. We're currently in the mastermind. We are doing a devotional study, I guess you will,
00:18:19 through the Book of Proverbs, reading a chapter a day and then each every person's commenting. So everyone gets a PhD at the end of this because you re proverbs often enough,
00:18:29 you you get a master's degree in finance and a couple of other things in there, right? Right.
00:18:36 And that's one of the things that we do is be tried to encourage one another in the Clements doing that we use the Bible at before.
00:18:43 It's very simple, but it's it's very, very profound, the effects that it's having on our community.
00:18:51 But one of the things that I keep seeing again and again, probably cause it's in the forefront of my mind is how many of the proverbs talk about the importance of having good men around you for counsel,
00:19:03 for accountability, for encouragement, for sharpening you for counsel, for help for confrontation. Proverbs. Forget the verse.
00:19:13 But it says the wounds of a friend can be trusted. But the kisses of the enemy cannot paraphrasing again because I don't have the Scripture rate in front of me.
00:19:21 But that that verse really speaks to how you can trust the criticisms. I guess you, if you will,
00:19:28 of a man of another man who has your best interest in mind the correction of that man. Another thing is Genesis way back at the beginning.
00:19:39 And I know this is in the context of creation in marriage. God said, it's not good for man to be alone,
00:19:45 eh? So he created Eve. But that general principle of it's not good for man to be alone still rings true.
00:19:51 And in our Western culture, individual is, um, still kind of reigns supreme, like I'm a man.
00:19:58 I don't need any help. I don't need any accountability. I'll figure it out myself, and I'll just go forward.
00:20:04 But you know what? You have all kinds of blind spots. You have attacks coming on you that you're not even aware off and you're not privy to because you have these blind spots and So the Ironman mastermind is my attempt to surround myself and give other men the opportunity to surround themselves with the band of brothers toe lock shields with to fight the battles that we need to fight on a on a daily,
00:20:29 weekly, monthly and so forth basis Well, and and one of the things I want to call out Izz,
00:20:35 you know, again that that sense of community it's good for Mento have other men in their lives, even if they have women in their life.
00:20:43 A swell. And it's good for women to have other women in their life, you know, even if they have men as well.
00:20:49 You know, my wife is part of, ah, reunion group. That's all women that you know,
00:20:54 meets weekly and talks and works on the Bible together and does other things. I'm part of a men's group,
00:21:02 you know, And so even though we rely on each other because we're husband and wife and we should,
00:21:07 we also seek outside groups and councils to support us in other ways. And so it's it's not an either,
00:21:14 or it's a both, and you know you need both of these. If you're in that situation. And I know again having had conversations with you and seeing the conversations you have in the community.
00:21:25 I know you agree with that. So with within the mastermind, I mean is, you know, obviously,
00:21:31 uh, would you talk a little bit more? Because when we use that term mastermind, some people know exactly immediately go.
00:21:38 Yeah, that's I know what that is. But at least in your case, would you talk a little bit about how you feel,
00:21:44 Donna Mastermind or how you structured it or what it looks like our you know, Why do you call it a mastermind,
00:21:50 as opposed to just a men's group or any of that kind of detail store? And And I may have run my mastermind differently than other people do.
00:21:59 And almost all of them are different from every other, having been part of several over the years. And it's called a mastermind versus a men's group because mastermind sounds cooler,
00:22:08 right? No, uh, it was it was a better marketing term. That's why exactly it sounds more masculine than just men's group.
00:22:18 I know that the idea of a mastermind is it's a collection of minds together that are better than the individual minds separately.
00:22:29 So it's kind of that synergistic approach to a group to life rather than just on your own. Okay?
00:22:38 And so how we generally run things. We it's all virtual. We have guys from all over the country with a guy that's actually in in Iraq,
00:22:48 and he joins in. It's like 4 30 in the morning when he when he pops on for him.
00:22:54 And so we I'll just tell you how how it functions. We meet once a week. We share our wins for the week.
00:23:02 Each guy gets a turn being in what we call the spotlight or the man in the middle or the hot seat.
00:23:07 I mean, different masterminds call it different things. Each week, a different guy gets a turn and he brings forth a challenge or a problem or struggle or question.
00:23:19 That's on his mind, and we kind of rally around him, be that band of brothers. We lock shields with him and we offer our insight,
00:23:27 wisdom, perspective and those kinds of things in. It's amazing how one guy's problem filters down to the other men and that they have either struggled with that or we hit on something that is kind of tangential to his issue.
00:23:46 But it really resonates with another guy. For example. Just another illustration. You know, Preacher will preach a sermon,
00:23:53 and he has his main point that he wants to drive home and he's trying to do that. But the people in the seats,
00:23:59 maybe that's not the main thing they're getting from that service. They picked up on maybe one of his illustrations or a side point he made,
00:24:06 and that's what they needed to hear. So that's kind of how it works. It's not just like the man in the middle.
00:24:12 He's benefiting, but but everybody else is because they're getting to speak into his life. And as they speak into his life there,
00:24:19 speaking into one another's lives and oftentimes will challenge that guy to step up and take action in an area of it,
00:24:27 that he needs to take action. In course we pray over one another. I do. Ah, I have an activity tracker tool that I use and we track our activities and seven different areas off our lives,
00:24:40 and they report out on that each week we keep in touch. We text each other. We have a private chat group.
00:24:46 We have a private Facebook group and also bring guys in for trainings. Sometimes I've had different guest I've had on the podcast.
00:24:54 Come in to the Ironman Group and do an exclusive training for us. It's a This is really guys opportunity to really step up in their lives and take the next step.
00:25:07 And it's for guys it really want, really want to be serious about stuff. If yeah, that sounds like a great opportunity.
00:25:14 I I like the illustration by the way of the sermon, because I do preach. I'm what they call a servant in the Methodist Church.
00:25:20 And so I actually get the preach. I preached many different churches around the state of Texas, and,
00:25:27 um, it's always interesting to me that I'll preach a sermon and someone will come up to me at the end of the sermon and go.
00:25:32 I loved it when you said and they'll say something and I'm like, That's nowhere in that sermon. Where did you get that?
00:25:39 I have no idea, and I often times record my sermon so I could go back and listen to it later and I'm like,
00:25:43 No, I actually didn't say that, but that's what God put on their heart. From what I did say,
00:25:49 you know, and it's I mean to me, it's proof that the spirit works because not my words,
00:25:54 you know, that was not what I said literally by, you know, yet that's the message you here,
00:26:00 and I think the same thing can happen in the mastermind. Sometimes the spirit speaks through the situation or the words that people say in a way that sometimes we don't have any clue why it works that way.
00:26:11 But it works. Yeah, and you know what's really interesting? And I've had different guys will report to me on this,
00:26:19 if you're if you're struggling with this situation and then another person from outside offers a different perspective, they might have thought was like a no brainer.
00:26:29 But because your rate in the thick of it your rate in the trenches, you can't see it, and it's kind of like if you're in a forest and your three inches from a tree,
00:26:39 all you're going to see is the bark. But if you're up in an airplane, you could see the whole forest you could see where it starts,
00:26:44 where it ends, where the waterways are and everything like that. And I think that happens in our lives.
00:26:49 Sometimes we're so deep in the trenches sometimes that we can't see what's going on around the rest of the situation.
00:26:56 But when you bring other people into it, they can offer perspectives and insights that weren't even on your radar because of where you are.
00:27:06 But for them, it's like a no brainer. And that's happened so many different times and it reminds,
00:27:12 makes me think just like what you were talking about with your sermon. Well, and it's it's also sometimes,
00:27:18 you know, when someone else is dealing with a problem there emotionally connected to the problem. S O.
00:27:24 With the way we're created, our brains don't work so well when we're emotionally overloaded. You know, we kind of go into a fight,
00:27:31 flight or freeze, right? That's you know, the fighter flight is what everyone calls it, but technically it's fight,
00:27:36 flight or freeze. And when you're in that mode, you're not really processing information anymore. You're just survival mode,
00:27:45 you know, I've got to protect my family. I've got to protect myself. What am I gonna D'oh But somebody outside it,
00:27:51 quite frankly, they're not as emotionally connected. And that doesn't mean they don't love you. That doesn't mean they don't care about you.
00:27:56 That doesn't mean they don't want them. But they're not in the emotional thick of it. You know,
00:28:00 it's oftentimes we see, you know, it's same thing happens in coaching. Client will say something. And I'm like,
00:28:06 Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. You know, here's a tool and they're like, Wow, I never would have thought of that.
00:28:12 And it's like, Well, but it's obvious, because I'm not in the thick of it on the same thing happens there.
00:28:18 So, yeah, I've seen that power before on several environments. I agree. So, Patrick, um,
00:28:27 now I've got to kind of put you on the spot. You know, if if you if you had a magic wand,
00:28:33 if you could work on what you see around you, whether that's in Western culture, whether that's in the world when it comes to men,
00:28:43 what would you say are some of the most important things that men should really be focused on? Whether that's learning,
00:28:50 whether that's changing things that we do or we don't do society as a whole. What, you know,
00:28:56 what kinds of things should men be focused on? Attacking or change? Will attack is probably the wrong word,
00:29:01 but changing, at least in the world today. See, there's there's the masculine coming through attack. No,
00:29:09 but I I don't see there think there's any problem with using that word or that phraseology when it comes to men.
00:29:16 I think the overarching thing is we need to focus more on what what I would call biblical masculinity or biblical manhood.
00:29:28 And we could filter down through that and get into some of the particulars if you want. But I think that's the big issue is that the culture has so influenced the church in influenced men in trying to redefine what real masculinity is is.
00:29:45 And now it's now It's a huge problem because in mass, men don't know what it means to be a riel.
00:29:56 Honest, godly, biblical Christ following man. So what would that look like? What would Ah, what it and you know again,
00:30:05 in your opinion, from from what you've seen, talk a little bit about more that what? What do you mean by Bill Bittle manhood.
00:30:11 I think I know what you mean, but I don't want to assume right, Right. So again,
00:30:18 I'm speaking in over arching, sweeping generalities here, and and this may not be this situation for particular individuals who listen to your show who we coming in contact with?
00:30:30 But this is in general. I think the issue is his biblical masculinity, and ultimately we need to look to the example of Christ for what a true biblical man is.
00:30:45 I remember a bit ago. Lt is a start. A little bit a bit ago, I talked about the over feminization of the church and efficient unity in the Western world.
00:30:55 This is part of the problem. Not the femininity is bad, but that if we have it to the exclusion of masculinity,
00:31:06 then it's a problem. And I'm not saying that it's woman's falter Anything like that. I'm just Mr Way it ISS.
00:31:13 And so if you look at a lot of how Jesus is portrayed, he's often portrayed as the Lamb of God,
00:31:22 which again is true. He's often portrayed as this soft, gentle man with the flowing robe and long hair and nicely come beard with Children on his knee.
00:31:34 And again, that's an aspect of the compassion and love and gentleness of Christ. But Jesus is also the lion of Judah,
00:31:43 and he is the king of kings. He's also the Lord of Lords. If you re this is why encouraged men that we're seeking God are struggling with God to read the Gospels because you will get an accurate picture of who Jesus is.
00:31:58 Yes. Sees those things. Yes, he says, Let the little Children come to me. But yes,
00:32:02 he also confronted people. Oh, he drove out the money changers from the temple with whips and he got mad flips.
00:32:11 Yeah, yeah, and that doesn't give us the right to storm around the house and flip tables over.
00:32:17 But he had righteous anger. He expressed that emotion in a correct context, and he he was not sitting at that time.
00:32:27 He confronted the religious leaders of his day. They were constantly caressing disciples. Yeah, he calls. He calls Peter pretty much calls Peter Satan right to his face.
00:32:38 And you don't often hear that, or you often hear you get thee behind me, Satan, you know,
00:32:44 kind of as a joke. We say that to people. But think about it. Jesus was basically calling one of his closest men,
00:32:52 Satan in that which, by the way, means adversary. So he was actually calling him his enemy.
00:32:58 At that point in time, he's saying, You're you're being a stumbling block to me. You're being,
00:33:03 Ah, a adversary to me. The reason I wanted to call that out It's because nowadays, when you say the word Satan,
00:33:10 people immediately get the picture of the devil with Pitchfork. And but the Hebrew word is adversary isn't really what it means.
00:33:16 It means enemy or adversary, but keep going, right. So in that situation, Jesus was confronting one of his brothers,
00:33:27 and and that's that goes to my point of having a band of brothers in a mastermind group is that we often times will need to correct one another and confront one another.
00:33:38 And that's part of being of what being a man is is having a group of friends and keeping one another accountable for that sense.
00:33:47 But also, Jesus said, I did not come to this world to serve but to be served, but to serve and to give my life as a ransom for many.
00:33:57 And if you if you take that as the example, that's what we are called to do as men is to be servant leaders it lots of times.
00:34:06 You know, you mentioned how men are portrayed as being buffoons. Is the punchline to the joke? No,
00:34:12 we need it to be the backbone. Yeah, We need to be the backbone of our family. We need to be providers.
00:34:19 We need to be protectors. We need to be instructors. We need to be soft and gentle when when called upon to be.
00:34:29 Also, if you look in Ephesians, Chapter five want Paul talks about the relationship between Christ and the church and a husband and his wife.
00:34:37 How ah, husband ought to lay down his life and sacrifice his once in his needs for his wife and help help to purify her and help her to flourish and blossom and bloom into the woman that gods called and created her to be.
00:34:51 I mean, there's just so many different aspects. I'm just highlighting some of the ones on top of on the top of my mind and sidebar disclaimer.
00:35:01 I don't have all of these down. I don't want it. I do not at all want to cure.
00:35:06 Not holding yourself up is the ideal. Really? No, no, I'm trying todo I'm trying to hold Christ up as the ideal is that sometimes in communicating the message the messenger,
00:35:19 you can sometimes assume that role and I don't want to. I'm a work in progress, and I like to say that a lot.
00:35:26 I'm I am a work in progress and constantly tweaking and adjusting and trying to get my trajectory right so that I land where I ought to land and you're going back to the beginning of this because I want I want to reiterate something you said the folks that are regular listeners of the show know that one of my themes that I call and I've already actually said it earlier in the interview is I think one of the problems we have in Western society is we want to set things up as dichotomies is either or,
00:35:59 you know, Jesus is either masculine or feminine. God is a man or God as well, and the answer is no.
00:36:07 It's both. You know, there's a both and rather than an either or is there a feminine, using the Western mentality,
00:36:15 the Western language, your feminine traits, that Jesus. You can pull out examples and say, Look,
00:36:21 this is an example of that nurturing that kindness. The things that we say are are the feminine ideal and the same thing.
00:36:29 Can you pull out examples and say that Jesus did things that identify what we would say is a masculine ideal?
00:36:36 Yes, they're both there. But what we try to do is turn it into a one or the other.
00:36:43 Only look at one side, and God is much more complex than that. We as human beings are more complex than that,
00:36:50 Um, and that's where I think you can get the toxic version of masculinity and the toxic version of femininity,
00:36:57 where it's done to the exclusion of all else, all right, and and, you know, and it's looked at as it's a lot more complex than that.
00:37:07 You know, Andi have been made with that complexity and that we need to we need to acknowledge that in Revel in that in a way as opposed to hide it.
00:37:19 Yeah, and I I think again, going back to the example of Jesus. There are times when we are called to display more of those masculine traits that Alfa male mentality that step up and get it done?
00:37:31 No, no questions asked. No excuses given just charge forward and do it. And then there are times that were called to rest.
00:37:41 Relax, be a lover, be compassionate, be empathetic. And the reason Jesus's example is so good in this or so crucial is that he was able to balance those different qualities perfectly.
00:37:57 And that's that's one of the true hallmarks of a real biblical man. Is being ableto not completely shut off any of the quote,
00:38:09 softer feelings or character qualities, but be able to temper himself through the power of the Holy Spirit to display these different characteristics when called upon,
00:38:23 You know, they talk about a guy wears many different hats. Well, no window put on which hat and how long and how to use,
00:38:30 you know, do what you're supposed to do when that hat is on. Yeah, and of course,
00:38:34 and and that gets back to the That's the hard part. Yeah, that's the hard part. That's why I'm a work in progress.
00:38:43 That's why we're all the work in progress because I will tell you there's times that I've reacted completely the wrong way in a situation as well.
00:38:51 I mean, all of us do, Um I continue to because it is a work in process progress.
00:38:57 It's a journey, not a destination. Um, I don't think any of us ever get it. All right,
00:39:04 correct. So, Patrick is we kind of wrap up a little bit and move to the end. The one question that I always try to ask everyone and in some way,
00:39:14 shape or form is about stewardship. Um, we've reference that, you know, that's obviously the title of the podcast inspired stewardship.
00:39:24 And yet, over the years, what I found out is kind of like when I asked you to define what biblical manhood was.
00:39:29 I used the word, but it means something to me, and it often means something different to other people.
00:39:34 So would you talk a little bit when you hear the word stewardship? What does that mean to you?
00:39:38 And how has that word impacted or changed your life? Sure, I love to talk about that, because this this is a subject that's that's important in my life is Well,
00:39:53 I used to listen to, ah, talk radio a lot. I haven't for years, and one of the guys I would listen to is his Rush Limbaugh.
00:40:01 And in his intro, he'd always I forget about the whole thing was but one of the taglines or phrases he would always say was talent on loan from God.
00:40:11 And he was saying kind of tongue and cheek and ingested and just being silly and his normal over the top,
00:40:18 you know, type, type of thing. But stewardship is really the mindset of responsibility in my mind and that everything that we have is on loan from God.
00:40:32 So in that aspect, I agree with that. That quote, any talent you have is on loan from God.
00:40:37 Anything you possess is on loan from God, and it's, I think, lots of times people think when you hear stewardship,
00:40:44 you hear about you think about how you should handle your money and your finances. While it's true, that's a piece of it.
00:40:54 I think it's all encompassing through through your entire life and so that the impact that that has on me is that ideally 100% of everything that I am and everything that I own is God's and I,
00:41:12 and simply entrusted with it for this finite amount of time while I'm on Earth to used it for his glory for hangs kingdom and for his purposes.
00:41:22 And again, Like I said before, I'm a work in progress, so I don't always get it right.
00:41:26 I get selfish. I use his his stuff that I have for my own purposes, sometimes in a sinful way.
00:41:33 And but I'm a work in progress. But stewardship, to me is really of responsibility, given to you from God e like that.
00:41:45 Um, no, I like that. That that phrasing of it. And, you know, again,
00:41:50 I think it's something. One of the tack lines that I've used in the past of stewardship is about more than money,
00:41:56 because my joke way of saying it is usually in church. When you hear the word stewardship, it's code for we're starting a building campaign,
00:42:04 you know, comes the offering plate. Here comes the offering plate, but that yeah, that's definitely not what it what it means at all.
00:42:11 Or at least not all of what it means again. We're back to that that both and right right.
00:42:17 We tend to segment things and have this dichotomy. Stewardship means concerning money, but it definitely is a bigger thought than that.
00:42:26 Oh, for sure, you can find out more about Patrick and the things that he does over at Dad.
00:42:32 Hackers, not us. You confined him over on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram is Dad Hacker with the numeral one at the end.
00:42:40 Of course, I'll have links all of that in the show. Notes Patrick. Is there anything else you'd like to share with the Lister?
00:42:47 Sure, just a couple quick things. Number one. If you If you go to the website that hackers,
00:42:52 not us. There's a five day challenge I have there. It's free. Just goes right to your email.
00:42:57 Uh, I encourage you to take that. A lot of guys have gone through that and have gotten a lot out of it.
00:43:02 Also the podcast and you can join the community and find out more about what I have going on there.
00:43:07 But I wanted to just really reiterate one thing, and that is that whole concept of being a work in progress,
00:43:15 and I just want to highlight the fact that that's where I am I? I am a work in progress in so are you.
00:43:24 And if you're struggling at this time, you need to keep that in mind and just keep moving forward.
00:43:29 Day after day, put one foot in front of the other and we talked about this earlier. But this idea of making small little changes day in and day out over the long haul,
00:43:40 Sometimes the changes will be imperceptible. You won't even notice a change. And it might not even be for a while.
00:43:47 But just keep going. Keep making those changes. And they do accumulate over time to the result that you're looking for.
00:43:55 But you have to put the actions in on a daily basis consistently over time. So that's what I wanted to share.
00:44:02 Scott. Thank you. Thanks so much. And thanks for joining us today. Really appreciate it. Yeah,
00:44:07 man, it was a blast. I love doing this stuff. Thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship Podcast.
00:44:19 As a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, But act on what you've heard and find a way toe live your calling.
00:44:31 If you enjoyed this episode, Please, please do us a favor. Go over to inspired stewardship dot com slash iTunes rate all one word iTunes rate.
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