Episode 804 Help Enough People Get What They Want
[00:00:00] Scott Maderer: [00:00:00] Thanks for joining me on episode 804 of the inspired stewardship podcast. Hey, I'm Nick. Pavlidis from the confessions of a terrible husband podcast. I challenge you to not be a terrible husband or wife or friend like me by being intentional about stewarding your relationships. One way to be inspired to be a better husband is to listen to this.
[00:00:24] The inspired stewardship podcast with my friend Scott Mader.
[00:00:38] instead in times like this, whenever there's big issues like the pandemic and politics and all of this other stuff that goes on, it's so easy to just look at each other and argue and believe that the person on the other side is not only wrong, but is evil. [00:01:00] Welcome and thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship podcast.
[00:01:04] If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be. Then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling in the inspired stewardship podcast. We'll learn to invest in yourself, invest in others and develop your influence so that you can impact the word.
[00:01:32] And today's episode about investing in others through stewarding your talent. I talk with you about the Zig Ziglar quote. You will get all you want in life. If you help enough other people get what they want. I share how this mindset is the difference between influence and manipulation in my mind. And I also talk about why this can be so hard to remember in times like this.
[00:01:55] You've heard me talk about developing your talent and what are the best ways to do [00:02:00] that is through books. But if you're like most people today, it's hard to find the time to read. And that's why today's podcast is brought to you by audible. Go to inspired stewardship.com/audible to sign up and you can get a 30 day free trial.
[00:02:17] There's over 180,000 titles to choose from. And you can pick one and listen your way to developing your talents via audible. That's inspired stewardship.com/audible to get your free trial and listen to great books the same way you're listening to this podcast. One of my favorite quotes of all times from one of my favorite speakers of all time is that by Zig Ziglar, you will get all you want in life.
[00:02:47] If you help enough other people get what they want. The truth is that this idea, this philosophy of serving others is one that I talk about over and over again on the podcast, [00:03:00] because I think it is one of the most important ideas to get through. And it's one of the least understood. As well, because the truth is, I think a lot of times we look at it, not as helping others get what they want, but instead we look at it because we want to get what we want.
[00:03:20] We look at other people as a source of what we want, what we need of a source of business, a source of influence, a source of resources, whatever it is. But the truth is that if you actually ask people about their lives, if you actually listen carefully to their answers, if you actually help and find ways to help people.
[00:03:43] If you give and care for people and you truly do, it's not fake this. Isn't about fake caring. This is about honestly caring. What other people need. This is about genuinely respecting another person's ideas, opinions, [00:04:00] and accomplishments. Even if you don't necessarily fully agree with them, you still understand and respect them.
[00:04:09] I truly believe that most people are trying to do the best they can with what they know they want to do well for each other. Most people are not out to do evil to each other. Instead, most people truly want to do good, but the truth is that as they do this. They often are looked at by other people as wrong as angry.
[00:04:36] This is why so much of the division that happens is our in our country because the mindset isn't one of, let me listen to you, let me learn. Let me respect you. Instead. The mindset is one of what can I get from you? And it's that your view, your opinion, your desires, what you want out of the world is evil.
[00:04:58] It's somehow not [00:05:00] right now. Even the people that I ardently disagree with about issues around different topics. I still believe that their heart is usually in the right place that they truly do want to do what they feel is best for the world, for the country, for themselves, for their families. I may disagree with how we want to get there.
[00:05:21] I may disagree with their view of what right and wrong is, but I do still respect them. I don't, however, necessarily passively, just sit back and accept everything they say. I will argue, I will defend my view, but I'm also going to ask questions and try to work to understand where they're coming from. No, this is that difference that I've talked about before, of what I see as a difference between influence and manipulation often influence has a negative connotation.
[00:05:54] It almost comes across like a dirty word, but I use the word manipulation for that sort of negative [00:06:00] influence. This is where you're trying to make people do things because it's in your own. Best interest when that's what it's about when it's about power and control and doing things because it helps you and it doesn't help anyone else.
[00:06:14] In fact, it harms other people that to me, is manipulation while influence is building a relationship with people so that even if they disagree with you, They still like you, they still respect you. They still understand your viewpoint, that you can sit on the opposite sides of the table or the fence, and you can disagree and yet you can still have respect for them or each other.
[00:06:36] And I think we need more of that in our country. Instead in times like this, whenever there's big issues like the pandemic and politics and all of this other stuff that goes on, it's so easy to just look at each other. And argue and believe that the person on the other side is not only wrong, but is evil.
[00:06:59] That they're [00:07:00] diluted that they're harming you and others, that they're not trying to do the best for themselves and for others instead, they're trying to take advantage and you know what, sometimes that may even be true. But I think oftentimes we ascribe that to people. We believe that about people when it's not really true.
[00:07:20] We believe that about people too easily. We often see evil first where it's simply a difference of opinion because the truth is there's a lot of room for differences of opinion. I know that I'm not right about everything. I know that things where I have big biases and I have blind spots and I have things that I don't see.
[00:07:48] This is one of the reasons that I try to surround myself with wise counsel. This is one of the reasons that I trust things like science and peer reviewed. Resources, not because science or peer reviewed [00:08:00] resources are without bias. Not because they occasionally don't make mistakes or even often don't make mistakes.
[00:08:07] But because the way those things are set up by getting multiple opinions from multiple different sources, by having things where. Data and information is shared openly so that people can check it and cross check it and double check it. And in fact, by rewarding people who come out and find mistakes and find things that are wrong, it begins to self-correct itself.
[00:08:32] And I try to do that in other areas too. I don't just read one side of the page for the news. I don't just look at only things that already echo the opinions I already have. Instead I deliberately seek out people who have different opinions. I deliberately research data and opinions on the other side.
[00:08:53] And if I find reasons why I can't trust it, even if it's something that supports my position. [00:09:00] I try to throw that out. Now, I don't claim to be perfect about this. I'm far from it. I know I'm not, but it is something that as you begin to do that if more people would do that, I think there would be more openness and more ability to really actually work on that quote and help others get what they want.
[00:09:20] And out of that, I think we would all get what we wanted. Thanks for listening.
[00:09:31] Thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast as a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you liked this episode on the stewardship of talent, you can go over to inspired stewardship.com/talent and sign up for our five week series [00:10:00] on the stewardship of talent.
[00:10:02] Or if you're in the U S you can text four, four, two, two, two. Talent
[00:10:08] tips.
[00:10:09] Scott Maderer: [00:10:09] That's talent tips to four four, two, two, two, and get those tips until next time. Invest your time, your talent and your treasures. Develop your influence and impact .