Episode 1628: Interview with Sam Wegner about His Book The Weight of the Wait

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Scott Maderer: [00:00:00] Thanks for joining us on episode 1,628 of the Inspired Stewardship Podcast.

Sam Wegner: I'm Sam Wegner. I challenge you to invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent, and your treasures to live out your calling. Being able to recognize purpose during life's most difficult challenges is key.

One way to be inspired to do that is to listen to the Inspired Stewardship Podcast with my friend Scott Maderer.

I don't like to wait, actually, if I'm honest, I abhor it. In fact, I will. I will take a 20 minute detour around a 10 minute traffic jam just to preserve the illusion that I'm making progress. I'm getting there faster because I'm [00:01:00] continuing to move. Right?

Scott Maderer: Welcome and thank you for joining us on the Inspired Stewardship Podcast.

If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent, and your treasures for your true calling. In the Inspired Stewardship Podcast, you will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others, and develop your influence so that you can

Sam Wegner: impact the world.

Scott Maderer: In today's podcast episode, I interview Sam Wegner. I asked Sam about how he learned to deal with the weight of the weight and how that became his book. Sam also shares with you the lessons you can take from your own weight. And I also ask Sam to share what he's learned about God through his experiences.

I have a great book that's been out for a while now called Inspired Living. Assemble the Puzzle of your Calling [00:02:00] by mastering your Time, your talent, and your treasures. You can find out more about that book over@inspiredlivingbook.com. It'll take you to a page where there's information and you can sign up to get some mailings about it as well as purchase a copy there.

I'd love to see you get a copy and share with me how it impacted your world. Sam grew up in Italy as the son of church planning missionaries and felt called to ministry from an early age. Though his path took a surprising turn into a 30 year career in information technology, he never lost his passion for sharing hope and biblical truth.

Over the years, Sam has served as a pastor, teacher, elder. Missions coordinator, small group leader, and most recently as chaplain for the young adults at Faith Bible Church in the Woodlands, Texas, where he's affectionately known as Uncle Sam. Regardless of the role his heart has always been to find ways to connect people to God's purpose in the middle of [00:03:00] life's hardest seasons.

Sam's new book, the Weight of the Weight, was born from deeply personal experiences. He thought he had learned to manage the heaviness of weighting as he cared for his wife during her battle with breast cancer. But when the disease spread to her bones and became incurable, he began to feel that weight in a whole new way.

Even as treatment slowed the cancers progress, it extended the waiting and with it, the emotional burden.

Welcome to the show, Sam.

Sam Wegner: Thank you, Scott. I'm glad to be here.

Scott Maderer: Absolutely. And I'm glad to have you. I talked a little bit in the intro about some of the work you've done with missionary work and ministry work and these different activities as well as, as your new book. But I always think it, it's interesting to talk to people 'cause we, we talked to 'em at the point in their [00:04:00] journey, but that's never really how they got to the point, to their journey, if that makes sense.

Yeah.

Sam Wegner: Okay. Yeah.

Scott Maderer: So let's go back in time a little bit, talk a little bit about what your journey's been and how this has come to be the message that you feel called to put out into the world.

Sam Wegner: Yeah. So actually this is the convergence of a couple of different streams in my life. The, the first was about 10 years ago.

My wife was diagnosed with breast cancer and that caught me. Completely off guard. Uh, I didn't realize how much I didn't know about the disease or about how to manage the disease, even about what my insurance, how my insurance worked. Uh, until you have, you have to put those things in into play. And so there was a lot of [00:05:00] new things that I had to get used to.

And one of them was the seemingly incessant trips to doctors and hospitals and ERs and all those kinds of things. The, so that kind of started this whole thing of me just having to get accustomed to sitting around and waiting because I wasn't the one who everybody's attention was focused on. It was focused on my wife.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm.

Sam Wegner: And and then there were a variety of secondary issues and complications and things that had to be dealt with, and it goes on and on and on. One of those happened to be the fact that when she had her mastectomy, they also had to remove some lymph nodes underneath her arm because the cancer had spread there.

And it's a very [00:06:00] common thing in breast cancer patients, but what this does is it creates a condition called lymphedema, which means basically that lymphatic fluid, it builds up in your arm and, uh, if it's not managed appropriately and not treated well, then what can happen is that that fluid will build up, it chokes off blood supply to the limb, and in extreme cases can even result in the.

In amputation. So it was a focal point of a lot of our therapy during those initial years. And as part of the, uh, the reconstruction that was done they transplanted lymph nodes from another, a place in her body underneath her armpit. And the surgeon who did this is very very successful, very, very smart, has done hundreds and hundreds of these.

And he [00:07:00] said that even in the best scenarios, most people still have to wear a compression sleeve on their arm to control the swelling. And, uh, we were expecting that. And, but after her surgery, uh, those new lymph nodes, they just kicked right in and they started draining the fluid very effectively. And he was shocked and surprised.

And he even got to a point where he said, you know, you come back next month and your numbers, your measurements are as good as they are right now, you won't have to wear that sleeve anymore. And that was kind of the symbol for us, that, you know, you're really never over cancer, right? Because once you're a cancer patient, you're always a cancer patient.

But being able to ditch that sleeve was really a big thing for us. And so we were super excited about it. I [00:08:00] planned, uh, a trip to Paris because she'd always wanted to go visit Monet's Garden and see the Louvre and all those type of things. So we were gonna go to Paris to celebrate. And it just so happened that all this occurred in March of 2020.

And so the same week that the world shut down due to COVID-19, we got test results right after we just had that visit with her doctor saying that the cancer had metastasized.

Now, when breast cancer metastasizes, it usually shows up in either the brain, the bones, the liver, or the lungs. And all her soft tissue was clear, but her bones were not, and the most concerning tumors were on her spine.

[00:09:00] And so we're like, oh, here we go again. Right. And at first I thought, okay, we'll just. Continue treating it the way that we always have. It's just sort of a continuation of the same journey. I had no idea how radically different dealing with metastatic cancer was, than, than normal cancer if there is really such a thing.

And so our oncologist put her on a medication and it had its side effects and we were accustomed to dealing with side effects, but these were new and they were nastier. And the game definitely changed. And then we got about nine or 10 months into that and we go to a routine appointment and the doctor says the drug has stopped working.

And I was like, what do you mean it stopped working? What does that [00:10:00] even, how does that even happen? It was pretty naive on my part, but that's when I realized that these, that's what happens. The disease adapts to the treatment and at a certain point it no longer is effective. But then she dropped the ball on us.

The, the big news on us is that she said, there's nothing more that I can do for you. Now, this doctor, you've gotta understand, Scott, she had gone to bat for Crystal for the past six years. There is a, a tumor board that meets every Tuesday at MD Anderson Cancer Center, which is where doctors present some of their most challenging cases.

And they review the, the data and they collectively make a recommendation to the doctor about how to proceed with this. [00:11:00] And so you can imagine that there are tens of thousands, maybe hundreds of thousands of patients just in the MD Anderson system. And so a doctor who wants to present a patient has to fight to get them in front of the tumor board.

Mm-hmm. Right. This is not just something, okay, who's got something on the agenda and we wanna talk about No, you've, you've gotta make a case that this is worthy of, of talking about. And this doctor had presented Crystal's case, not just once, but three times in front of the tumor board. That's how hard this woman was fighting for us.

And then she turns around and says, there's nothing more I can do. And she said, we're gonna have, I'm gonna have to refer you to a trial oncologist. And I was like, [00:12:00] you mean this is it? This is over now. And I felt betrayed. I felt like the whole floor had been ripped out from underneath of me.

And I began to have to deal with the fact that the reality of my wife dying from this disease was not just an eventuality or a possibility, it was now an imminent reality and we were gonna start putting numbers to it.

And, uh, I didn't know really how to deal with that. So pause. The other side of this story was happening in my place of work.

I've [00:13:00] had a 30 year career in information technology, been very successful. How I got down that journey is a topic for like 17 other shows, so I'm not gonna get into that here. But the Lord had very definitely led me to this job and he had blessed me and I'd been very successful and we've done some very difficult and, uh, challenging things.

And I had developed, I thought a good relationship with my boss. And then one day somebody said something to her misquoting me. But she was offended by it. And, uh, when she confronted me about it, I tried to explain and, you know, of course denied that I'd said anything like that. Tried to put my [00:14:00] character up, uh as a witness as this is not who I am, this is not how I roll.

And yet there wasn't any convincing her. And from that point on things got really difficult. And over the course of about two years things deteriorated progressively until finally she found a, an opportunity to eliminate my job as part of a corporate restructure.

And, and, uh, I was let go. So the. While the metastatic diagnosis and me dealing with all of that was happening at home, I was also dealing with this very uncomfortable situation in the workplace.

And I was very, very [00:15:00] cognizant of the fact that God wanted me to stay there. Most people would've said, Hey, you got a bad situation just up and leave.

You know, you, you go find something else. You're a talented guy. You've got lots of experience. I'm sure there are multiple opportunities out there for you. I was like I've asked the Lord about that. And we're very, he's very clear. This is where I'm supposed to be. You know, these things were, were colliding at the same time and I.

I really was not in a good place either mentally, emotionally, or spiritually at that point in time. And, uh, a friend came and asked about our situation and wanted to know how my wife was doing and that kind of thing. And I gave him the [00:16:00] medical rundown and he looked at me, he said, yeah I, what I really wanna know about Sam is how you're handling the weight.

And that kind of took me aback a little bit because nobody had ever put that question to me quite like that before. And I had all kinds of canned responses for responding to the normal inquiries about the cancer journey, about the job, and all those kind of things. I knew how to say all the politically correct stuff and all that kind of jazz.

But when I got caught off guard with that question, I just kind of instinctively blurted out that the heaviest part of the weight was the weight.

I was waiting for my wife to die. I was waiting for some resolution of some sort to my [00:17:00] job situation, and neither was coming and I was being crushed under the heaviness of it.

And I didn't really realize it until my friend unintentionally pulled it out of me. But once it was there in front of me, once I actually heard it, heard myself say it out loud, then I realized, you know how heavy it was. And so I started doing some study. In the scriptures to try to find an answer.

How am I supposed to deal with this? What is the purpose behind all of it? What am I supposed to do here? And what came out of that was a set of principles that, um, started just kind of jumping off the page at me as I was even doing casual [00:18:00] reading through the Bible, and the Lord started helping me put pieces of it together.

And that ended up being what I ended up writing down in the book.

Scott Maderer: When, uh, when people go through challenges like this, a lot of times you know, the way we respond, uh, especially people of faith, it, it's, sometimes it deepens our faith. Sometimes it drives us away. Sometimes it's a little bit of both.

How has your faith journey kind of intersected with the life journey that you've been on? And then how has the life journey that you've been on affected affected your faith journey?

Sam Wegner: Well, they definitely go hand in hand for me personally. I became a believer in Jesus Christ as a very, very young child.

And so I've been at [00:19:00] this a while. I'll let you guess how many decades that is. It's a,

Scott Maderer: a year.

Sam Wegner: Yes. It's one of those, it's one of those think speed limits. Um you know, being being a believer reading my Bible, participating in church activities, uh, even being a missionary, it's always been part of my life.

So it's always kind of been intertwined. But I realized when I hit those crisis points that what I had achieved up to that point the amount of growth and understanding that I had up to that point, it wasn't enough because I was not handling these situations well. I needed better answers and I needed to [00:20:00] grow.

And so the difficult experiences drove me into the scriptures to find a solution. And what I found there, real solid answers that when you just kind of say them out loud, sound a little simplistic, but as I began to actually focus on, applying them in my real life situations. I found that there was substance there, that there my situations weren't changing.

God certainly wasn't changing. He never changes. I was changing.

And that made a difference. And the, the biggest part of that that I became aware of was just how many people were watching all of this happen. [00:21:00] This was not a private situation. Hundreds of people, thousands, perhaps now, know about my wife's health condition.

And we've been very open in sharing about it. So it's out there. It's on social media. Particularly now that I've started doing interviews like this, it's all over the internet now. Anybody who wants to know, can know, and we haven't been, and we've been pretty transparent about sharing a lot of details about that at work.

Everybody was watching what was going on between me and my boss on a daily basis, on an hour by hour basis on a conversation by conversation basis. And I was very, very,[00:22:00]

I was very, very aware of the fact that people were watching how I was responding, and that created a sense of responsibility on me to respond appropriately.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm.

Sam Wegner: And I welcomed that because. I have a tendency when left to my own devices to get lost in my own head to kind of make up my own idea of what reality is and, and how things are.

That isn't true. But when you're confronted with other people and you know that they're watching everything you say and everything you do, and you've made statements about this is the right thing to do and this is the way I'm gonna approach these situations, when you're not consistent with that, everybody knows and there's no hiding it.

So they, [00:23:00] they very much intertwined. I don't know that I'm able to separate my life from faith. And to me, that's actually the beautiful part of this is that my faith was. Very practical. It was something that I was relying on on a daily basis. And when I was true to living out these principles that I was learning as I was going through this, they were real.

And it was consistent and it was effective. And I wasn't having to tell anybody that these were real things. They were able to see it. And they were telling me, and they were asking me, Sam, I don't understand how you can be this way, but they acknowledged that was the case. And so [00:24:00] I actually like to say that I was being made an example of not by, by Moss, but by God and not by, not in a bad sense.

Right. I was being. Made an example of this is the way that you're supposed to do things. This is the way that you're supposed to respond to these situations. And I was like, a lot of times Lord, are you really sure you picked the right person for this? Because I don't know that I can do this.

But that was part of, that was also part of the process is understanding that I could not do it and I needed to be, you know, let him live out his character through me. It's kind of a long answer, but those are, mm-hmm. Those [00:25:00] are the ways those two things interacted together.

Scott Maderer: Let's talk a little bit about the weight of the weight and just to be clear to people that are, are listening, the, the first weight is as is in heavy, and the second weight is in stopwatch weight, you know?

Just because Yeah, the W-E-I-G-H-T-T-I-T-W-A-I ht

Sam Wegner: Yeah,

Scott Maderer: because since, since it is, uh since they are the wonderful English words that we have that, you know, so you gotta love English. Um, my wife hates it. She's, she's dyslexic and she's like, ah, I don't like all, you know, make these rules make sense.

I'm like, eh, they don't. But talk a little bit about the book and the lessons that, that you've installed in there. Why, why is, uh that why is that the story or the title or the message? You know, the, the weight of weight. [00:26:00] What are you, what are you kind of talking about there and what, what lessons have you distilled into the book?

Sam Wegner: Yeah, so typically when we think about waiting I, I know I usually approach it with dread. I don't like to wait. Actually, if I'm honest, I abre it and in fact, I will, I will take a 20 minute detour around a 10 minute traffic jam just to preserve the illusion that I'm making progress.

I'm getting there faster because I'm continuing to move, right? That's just how I'm wired. And what I found is that when I was. Confronted [00:27:00] with the those imminent realities that I was eventually gonna lose my job and I was eventually gonna lose my wife. The thing that I found the most challenging about it was not that those events were going to happen, if you're gonna do it, let's just do it right. I'm ready for those events to happen. What I was struggling with was how long it was taking to get to those points.

And when you are confronted with the, when I was confronted with the truth of that statement about myself, it's very damning because.

You know, I, it's not really cool, Scott, for you to go up to your wife and say, [00:28:00] you know what, hun, why don't you just go ahead and die?

Scott Maderer: Yeah.

Sam Wegner: So I can get over my problem. That's very selfish.

Scott Maderer: And, and even admitting that to yourself and not even saying it out loud is, is computational. Yeah.

Yeah.

Sam Wegner: Yeah. I mean I didn't actually allow myself to even think it.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm.

Sam Wegner: I was just feeling it. And when my friend asked me that question and I kind of blurted out what was inside, then I began to say, wait a second. This is out there now. My, my struggle is not with the grief of loss. My struggle was with how long it was taken to get there.

And that was, that [00:29:00] said a whole lot of bad things about me, quite frankly. And I started to wrestle with that and I said, why is this such a problem for me? And I realized that there are two things that I think make make weighting heavy. First of all, the more difficult the circumstances in which you're waiting, the more you feel it.

And the longer those things go on, you just end up getting fatigued.

And so that enters into it, and that just makes the whole process that much more difficult. The thing that I came to, I really had to come to grips with is that waiting is really about control and who has it.[00:30:00]

And when you're waiting, typically you don't have control.

And that's what makes it frustrating is that you're found, you find yourself in this situation, whether you're stuck in traffic, whether you're trying to get through a checkout line at a grocery store, at a department store, and it's Christmas and the store is understaffed and the cashiers are slow, or even worse, they've got the self checkouts and the people.

Who are in front of you can't find a UPC symbol on their stuff to save their life that kind of thing. Or you're dealing with something that's actually life altering, like waiting for someone to pass [00:31:00] away. What makes it so frustrating is that you don't have any control over it. You can't make it go faster.

We try to figure out ways roundings and, and try to take control back. And where I, what I had to come to grips with is that I was wrestling with control for control with God. I was wrestling for control with God, and I'm not gonna win that battle. What I needed to do was try to understand the purpose and the reason behind the waiting, what he was trying to accomplish with the waiting.

So I start with a set of basic principles. For me, the core thing was that God is good.

[00:32:00] And that means that he doesn't do bad, he can't be bad. If he is bad or does bad, then he's no longer God because he's falling short of some standard. And there's a whole, you know, that again, that's another two hour conversation that we can get into.

But that's where I had to come to grips with that God is good. Then I had to understand is that he intentionally created waiting to be a part of the fabric of the universe. And he did that when he created time. And inherent in the whole concept of time is the passage of moments, which means there's always waiting.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm.

Sam Wegner: And then, and the reason that he did that, and the, and the thing that really kind of connected all of this together was the connection between waiting and hope [00:33:00] In Romans 8 24 and 25, the Apostle Paul says that things that, that which is seen is not hope because what a man sees, why does he yet hope for it?

But if we hope for what we do not see, then with perseverance, we eagerly wait for it. And. That's when I saw that hope and waiting go hand in hand. You can't have one without the other. As much as I despised waiting, I wanted hope. I needed hope. And yet Paul is saying they go hand in hand. If you want the one, you gotta have the other.

And then I got directed over [00:34:00] to book of Hebrews in chapter 11 where the author there explains that hope is a component of faith. Faith is the substance of things hoped for. So we hope for something when it becomes realized, or when we act on that hope, we demonstrate faith. And then a couple verses down later, he says that without faith, it's impossible to please God.

So this was the first thing that kind of struck me between the eyeballs waiting. Is an essential component of hope. They go hand in hand. Hope is a component of faith. Without faith, it's impossible to please God. Therefore, it's impossible to please God without waiting. Let that one sink in for a little bit.

And that's when I realized that I'd been doing a lot of stuff wrong [00:35:00] because I had, if I wanted to please God, and I wanted to demonstrate faith, and I wanted to have hope, that means I needed to change my entire attitude towards waiting. And then when, as I continued to explore it, and I saw the connection there at a time, I realized that God created time at the very beginning when things were good and that he, he intentionally built the universe this way, and he did so.

So that there would be waiting because without waiting, it's impossible to please God. And that's what he wanted us to do. He wanted us to have a relationship with him. He wanted us to be dependent upon him. He wanted us to have hope in him. He wanted us to have faith in him. And in order for us to do that, we have to wait for stuff.

And what I [00:36:00] used to see as this overbearing burden that was being placed on my life kind of got flipped upside down. And I saw that these experiences that I was having with waiting was actually the intentional creation of a compassionate, loving good god. Who built the universe in such a way that I really had no other option

to, but to be driven to him and to have that relationship with him, that's why he did it. And when I fight him on that, then I'm rejecting all of that [00:37:00] stuff. And that's part of what makes it hard.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm. Well, and I think what you said at the beginning I think is an important realization that a lot of times the frustration in waiting is really about.

Control and which at its core is really about pride, you know? Right. Yep. You know it, it, it it's prideful to decide that you're in control of everything. You know? It reminds me one of my favorite quotes that it's attributed to Mark Twain, but I don't believe it was Mark Twain who said it.

'cause it really doesn't sound like Mark Twain. But one of the things that he, that somebody said that supposedly was Mark Twain was, uh one of the best days in my life was when I realized there was a God. And the second best one was when I realized it wasn't me.

Sam Wegner: Yeah.

Scott Maderer: And I think that second part is the part that I, I don't know about you, but that's the part I've had the most struggle with.

You know, I can accept there is a God [00:38:00] I struggle sometimes with remembering it's not me.

Sam Wegner: Yeah. No, I think that's really what the whole crux of the entire question is is is, is who gets to be God. And that's not a very comfortable thing to be presented with. And I think one of the reasons why a lot of people choose to say, well, I don't believe that there is a God, because it sounds like that's a good way to avoid having to deal with that issue.

It's not, but they kind of perceive it to be that way. But that's really at, it really is at the core of everything. Who is God and how comfortable am I, am I with that arrangement?

Yeah.

Scott Maderer: And again, to be, to be fair, to be true, I think most of us, again, even people raised to the church, [00:39:00] even people of faith you know it, it's kind of back to the old. If a church was made up of perfect people, well they wouldn't let me in anyway. So, um, you know I, none of us are perfect in this journey.

So it's, it is, that's why it's the journey that we're on. Not, not we've all arrived.

Sam Wegner: Yeah. That, that's true. And I am living testimony of that fact and yet while we are never going to be God

We can get better. At this whole process. Uh, I, I don't want people to think that there, there isn't any hope of improvement is kind of throw up their hands and say, okay, let's just why should I even bother?

It matters. Mm-hmm. And, um [00:40:00] it makes a, it really has made a significant difference in my life and I think it can make one in yours and everybody who's listening. And

it touches other people too. It it's not without purpose. Yeah.

Scott Maderer: No, it touches other people too. You know, thank you for, for saying that.

'cause you're right, I don't want people to think it's not work. So I'm, I'm a Methodist and John Wesley, one of his quotes is on towards perfection. Meaning, you know, you're always striving for perfection, but you also have to realize that you've, you've never arrived there yet either. You know, that doesn't mean you don't strive for it, but.

It's a journey not a destination. You don't, you don't ever,

Sam Wegner: one of the things actually that I found very encouraging, uh, about my understanding of this is that one of the, one of the things that, that God did when he created time was he made it cyclical.

And I think that was intentional as well, because I [00:41:00] have perfectionist tendencies and so when I don't get it right I'm kicking myself and I'm like, oh my goodness, I can't believe that I did that stupid thing and blah, blah, blah, and I've failed.

What I've come to learn throughout this process is that this whole thing is intended to operate on a cycle. In the book, I talk about the waiting wheel and I show how these concepts of, of confidence. The goodness of God and the character of God leads to hope, which leads to faith, which leads to rest.

And that turns back into the character that of God that he's building in us. And the most encouraging thing about that whole thing was the understanding is that he meant [00:42:00] it to be repeated.

Over and over again. He acknowledges the fact that we're not going to get there all in one go.

It's designed for it to be incremental. Um, I talked to an example I've used with some folks is, you know, we do not expect a toddler to be able to do doctoral degree work. We don't fault them for it.

We don't flunk a kid because he fails one English test. What do we do in those situations?

We identify where the deficiency is, right? We come back around and we cover that material again, and you go over and [00:43:00] over again until you get it. Because the objective is not to pass. The objective is to learn. And to grow. And so we naturally understand that and our own development in our own cycles at school, at work, in life in general.

And yet when it comes to God. We kind of treat it like it's an all or nothing kind of a, kind of an experience. Now, make no mistake, God is perfect and holy and just and good. And he is the ultimate standard. And the standard is the standard. Mm-hmm. It doesn't change. I'm not talking about lowering the standard.

And I'm not saying that we should make excuses for people doing bad things, but what I am saying is, is that that process of growing is [00:44:00] incremental.

Now if you have a kid who's 16 years old and can't do a simple first grade math problem, there's an issue there. There's a serious issue there that needs to be addressed and we recognize those type of things.

And so there is room here for you to say if you've been. Walking with the Lord for over 50 years like I have, there is a higher standard that should be expected from somebody like me. I should have learned some things by now. I should be at a certain level in, in my spiritual growth. But that doesn't mean that when I fail, 'cause I do that, it's all over.

And I don't have the opportunity to come back around and relearn that and improve and to get [00:45:00] better at it. And the fact that God recognized that limitation and intentionally built the universe so it would operate on these cycles was ENC was greatly encouraging to me.

Yeah. It wasn't an excuse for me to fail.

Scott Maderer: Right.

Sam Wegner: But it was reassurance that when I did, I wasn't jeopardizing my entire relationship with him.

Scott Maderer: Yeah. So I've got a few questions that I like to ask all of my guests, but before I ask you those, Sam, is there anything else about the book or your journey that you'd like to share with the listener?

Sam Wegner: I guess I would like to just put it out there that even though, this is [00:46:00] obviously a very spiritually focused book. And my journey and, and all of that is, is very much centered around the Bible and the scriptures. And I make no apology for that, that a lot of people might put it down or not pick it up because they say, oh, this guy's just gonna preach at me.

And that's not what this is. I recognize that there are people out there that don't believe the same things about God that I believe in. And I would encourage you to not read it as a religious book as a God book, but read it as a Sam book. This is my story. And my guess is that if you're weight, if you're picking up a book called The Weight of the Weight.

It's because you feel it. [00:47:00] And the one thing that I would ask you, not maliciously, but sincerely, is how is your system of dealing with those things working for you? And if you're picking up a book like this, chances are you've got some holes. And so I would respectfully ask that you set aside whatever biases you may have and just read it as my personal story and see if these things don't make sense and they don't end up answering some of the questions that, that you may have about it.

Mm-hmm.

Scott Maderer: So my brand is inspired stewardship, and I kind of run things through that lens of stewardship, and yet I've discovered over the years that that word can mean a lot of different things to a lot of different [00:48:00] people. So for you, what does the word stewardship mean to you?

Sam Wegner: I see stewardship as an acknowledgement that the things that I have, as you like to refer to my time, my talent, my treasures, they don't belong to me, they belong to somebody else.

And it's my responsibility as a steward to use those things the way the owner would like for them to be used. So in my world, that's God. And everything that I am, everything that I have, everything that I do. Is to be used in his service. And it's my responsibility of as a steward of those [00:49:00] things to use them in a way that honor and pleases him.

Scott Maderer: So this is my favorite question that I like to ask everybody. Imagine for a moment that I could invent this magic machine and with this machine I was able to take you from where you are today and transport you into the future, maybe 150, maybe 250 years. And through the power of this machine, you were able to look back and see your entire life, see all of the connections, all of the ripples, all of the impacts you've left.

What impact do you hope you've left in the world?

Sam Wegner: That's actually, to be honest with you, that's actually something that I've given quite a bit of thought to. Because I think it's an important question that we all need to think about and answer. [00:50:00] The short answer to that is that if I'm really a steward of what God has given me and everything that I am and have is his I'm not really, I'm not really looking for the impact that I've made.

Uh, I'm looking at the impact that he's made through me. Was I a good channel of that? Was I a good representative of for him? And. If he says that's good enough, then that's what matters to me. What's been beautiful a about this journey is that [00:51:00] he hasn't made me wait for the final judgment day. He hasn't made me wait for Scott to invent his miraculous time machine.

He has given me opportunities to see that as I'm going through this journey and how he's working in other people's lives as a result of what's what's going on in mine. And those are really some of the most rewarding and humbling things. Um. One of the things that we love to do, uh, is to play board games.

I'm part of a, of a group that actually started with a group of my son's friends. [00:52:00] And they were meeting once a month to play board games. And so tomorrow in fact is board game night. And, uh it's a special one. It's actually gonna be a board game day. We're gonna start at eight o'clock in the morning and run till 10 or midnight that evening, and that's all we're gonna do.

And, uh so over, over time, those kids, I call them they're young adults. They're very talented professionals, many of them. But uh, they've become very dear to us and we've had opportunities over the years to. To talk and to help them out, uh, be an example, help them work through the things that they're going through and all that kind of stuff.

And one of them happened to come over to our house yesterday for a visit, [00:53:00] and she my wife gave her something that she kindly want, you know, went to kind of refuse saying, no, you don't need to do that for us. And, and she was like, you know, this is something that I can do and I want to be able to give it. And the young lady said, but you've given so much. To us and to others.

It's now our turn to help you and to see that acknowledgement, to be able to witness the growth [00:54:00] in, in, in her life and to and for her to recognize that came as part of interacting with us. That's so rewarding.

And it's one of those little gifts that God doesn't have to give me.

And she's just one of many examples.

And, uh I I'm very humbled by it, but I'm also driven by it because. That's what proves to me that this is all worthwhile and it all makes a difference. Yeah.

Scott Maderer: So what's on the roadmap? What's coming next as you continue on your journey?

Sam Wegner: You know, I wish I knew and in part I'm kind of glad I [00:55:00] don't.

We I'm still unemployed and it's been over 18 months now, and so, uh, I've been trying to use this time to continue to share this message of, of hope and encourage people in their seasons of waiting. So I plan to do more of that. My wife is still here. That metastatic diagnosis is now let me do the math.

Yeah, so it was now been four years ago. And, uh, she's still here. We don't know how much longer that'll be, but you know, the Lord keeps, uh, extending that time period, which we're grateful for. It also extends my waiting, [00:56:00] but I'm learning how to deal with that better. And, uh you know, we're I'm just looking forward to other opportunities to, to share this message, interact, interact with people.

So if you've got any ideas or have anybody who needs some encouragement, send 'em my way.

Scott Maderer: And you can find out more about Sam over@samwegner.com. Of course, I'll have a link to that in the show notes as well. Sam, anything else you'd like to share with the listener?

Sam Wegner: Yeah. So one of the things that I just wanna make sure everybody understands is that, you know, this is this is really about sharing hope with people and wanting to make, wanting to make a positive impact in people's lives.

One of the things I think is in [00:57:00] inherent in doing that is us being transparent about where we are. And I think that it's necessary for people to realize that this isn't something that was just concocted in a, in a sterile environment. This is something that, uh, was lived out in the real world and we're continuing to live it out.

And so we're very transparent about the fact that I am. I am unemployed and we are currently without medical insurance because our COVID coverage just recently lapsed. And many people, when they hear that what are interested in what they can do to help. And so some friends of ours have set up a website, which I think Scott, you'll be posting also in the show notes where if you would like to help us with our medical expenses, [00:58:00] then there's a link there where you can do that. The organization is a is recognized as a nonprofit by the IRS. So your donations are tax deductible, but the goal and the purpose of that is. Not for me to get rich. This is for, um, to enable us to continue to come on shows like this and share a message of hope and how people can make it a real and practical part of their lives the way it has been for us.

And, uh, it's, it's really about helping others. So thank you for that.

Scott Maderer: Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. And yes, I will put a link to that in the show notes as well. For anyone that, uh is so inclined. I know or for, again, because I'm, I work with people on finances a lot. For those that don't know, [00:59:00] medical expenses can be one of the biggest things that can cause a lot of, of stress and strain, even for folks that are employed with insurance, much less when you're not.

So, uh, if people are inclined to help, I'll definitely have that link as well, um, uh, in the show notes so folks can find that there.

Sam Wegner: Yeah. And also be, before we sign off here, I just want to let everybody know that if you if you want to get a copy of the book, there are links to that are on the website as well, uh, and get it in print, in ebook in audiobook, which I narrated myself.

There's also a blog that I maintained. There were, I if you like that kind of content. There's always more there to consume. But the thing that I really, really wanna make sure people realize is that there's a contact form. And that [01:00:00] is the best way for you to get in, in touch with me if you have a question, if you wanna know more about how to make this a reality in your life.

If you want to share your story then please drop me a note. I'd love to hear from you. Uh, even if you want to have a debate, I'm open for that too. Uh, something I say just doesn't, you know, resonate with you. That's okay. I am, I'm here to, to talk it out. I welcome that kind of feedback, so please feel free to, to use that contact form.

Scott Maderer: Awesome.

Thanks so much for listening to the Inspired Stewardship Podcast. As a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live [01:01:00] your calling. If you enjoyed this episode please do us a favor. Go over to inspired stewardship.com/itunes.

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