Episode 1620: Interview with Portia Preston Author of Hustle, Flow, or Let it Go

===

Scott Maderer: [00:00:00] Thanks for joining us on episode 1,620 of the Inspired Stewardship Podcast.

Portia Preston: I am Dr. Portia Preston. I challenge you to invest in yourself, invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent, and your treasures to live out your calling. Having the ability to know that you are worthy no matter what is key.

And one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this The Inspired Stewardship Podcast with my friend Scott Maderer.

The parts that I struggle with is this idea that. How do you make palpable this joy that is set before you? And I think we do it through the practice of worship and prayer and connection and thinking about the positive. And I, I think that the ego is meant to wrestle with that because the ego wants to do something once and have it be [00:01:00] done.

Scott Maderer: Welcome and thank you for joining us on the Inspired Stewardship Podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be. Then you must learn to use your time, your talent, and your treasures for your true calling. In the Inspired Stewardship podcast, you will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others, and develop your influence so that you can impact the world.

In this podcast episode I interview Portia Preston. I ask her about how wellness can be great, but can also create a toxic culture. And Portia also shares how her book Hustle Flow or Let It Go, approaches a framework to let us do true self-care. I also ask her to share with you how we can not just rebound, but really recover from stress and burnout.

I have a great book that's [00:02:00] been out for a while now called Inspired Living. Assemble the Puzzle of your Calling by Mastering your Time, your Talent, and your Treasures. You can find out more about that book over@inspiredlivingbook.com. It'll take you to a page where there's information and you can sign up to get some mailings about it, as well as purchase a copy there.

I'd love to see you get a copy and share with me how it impacted your world. Portia Preston is the founder of Empowered To Exhale, partnering with individuals and organizations to cultivate a mindset and culture of sustainable wellness and performance. As an associate professor of public health at California State University Fullerton, she creates innovative programs for students, faculty, and staff.

And her research focuses on inclusive wellness. Portia holds a BA in Cultural and Social Anthropology from Stanford University, a Master's of Public Health from the University of Michigan, and a [00:03:00] doctorate of public health from UCLA. She lives in Long Beach, California, and she's also recently released her book.

Hustle flow or let it go. Welcome to the show, Portia. Thank you. Absolutely. I'm, I'm looking forward to our conversation today. So I talked a little bit about the, in the intro about your work your founder of and Empowered to excel a little bit about your book, uh, which we'll get into more later and, and some of your background and studies.

I always think it's funny. Intros never tell the complete story of how we got to where we are. And so take us back in time a little bit and share a little bit more about your journey and, and what's brought you to the point in life where this is the work you feel called to do.

Portia Preston: Sure. Well, I would say that I've been very curious about what it is.

To live a full life. So I've always been someone that wanted to go [00:04:00] for. The big goals that I had, and I wanted to, I just always had a curiosity. What is the best way to take care of myself and how am I different from other people? And I think that's just kind of the core mindset that I've always had. And the thread that has carried me through till now is that every struggle or discovery I've had has been integrated into that.

And so what evolved over time was this idea of wellness as more expansive. Then we, um, traditionally think about it. And I would say that started around the time that I was in my undergrad program at Stanford. I was studying cultural and social anthropology, and I was curious about how patients navigated their illness experience.

I know that's a very interesting topic, and I was curious also, um, being a black woman, I wanted to know the,

Scott Maderer: the short answer to that question is usually not very well, but Right.

Portia Preston: So, you know, knowing how we get treated by doctors how to patients create [00:05:00] agency for themselves and how do they make meaning of what they're going through?

And I thought that was a good roadmap for me because what I really wanted to get to is how does culture and society shape. The experiences of black women, but also of other groups. And little did I know at that time, that years later, after working for the Centers for Disease Control, getting a graduate degree in public health, I would end up being that patient, going through a kidney disease diagnosis and then a blood clot.

And that radically shifted my idea of wellness because it could no longer be about ideals. It really had to accommodate my reality.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm. And

Portia Preston: I realized if that is true for me, what is true for everyone else? So I was really on the mission to find something that would honor people's realities, and I think that's really what brought me into the work that I do today.

Scott Maderer: So as you were talking it, it made me think, and I can't remember the [00:06:00] name of the film. It is an older film and it basically the actor, the the main character is. He basically is playing a doctor who's a surgeon who you know is kind of high powered doctor and who has just the most atrocious bedside manner.

And then he gets diagnosed with an illness and he becomes a patient and it completely changes. You know how he looks at the experience and all of a sudden he. Discovers empathy and you know, these all, you know, little things like that. And, but he's also like the chief you know, he's the trainer. The, so when the the next year when the, uh residents come in, he literally assigns each of them a disease and says, you know, you're going to have all of the tests done.

You're gonna have you're gonna be treated, you know, you're not gonna take medicine for it because you know, but you're gonna be treated as if you. Have [00:07:00] this disease so that you've experienced what it feels like to go through the system as a patient. I can't remember the name of the film. I wish I could I'll have to, I don't know.

I'll have to go look it up. I think it's Jeff Bridges that's in it, but I'm not sure. That could be wrong too. But anyway, uh, you're, what you're talking about made me think of that because I think so often. Rightly or wrongly, we feel so powerless in, in the situation when we're dealing with a medical diagnosis or an illness or, and going through the, the medical system.

How, you know, what are some of the insights you had as you begin to study that and, and do that work?

Portia Preston: First, I think what you're alluding to is that so much of our experience is what we experience outside. Of the healthcare interaction. Mm-hmm. And so, just starting to think about how does this intersect with different parts of your life?

I know for me there was definitely a feeling of [00:08:00] being a professional patient. So juggling all of these appointments, trying to make different conflicting advice work and it pops up against your social life because all of a sudden you can't eat out at this place or you can't, you know, do all these things that were normative for your friend group.

And I think there's a fair amount of isolation and depression and bargaining and all of these things go on, but we don't really have a forward, focus on having these conversations in society. Often people don't really feel comfortable disclosing what their conditions are, you know, in the workplace, unless they absolutely have to.

And so we end up processing a lot of this on our own. Rather than have you.

Scott Maderer: Have you studied and, and no is a perfectly acceptable answer to this question, but it just dawned on me as you were talking. I wonder how different it [00:09:00] is in different parts of the world. You know, you know the, the United States versus.

Even Canada or Yeah. You know, or Japan or, you know, and so it's even other developed countries, but Yeah, with completely different cultures around it. Yeah. Have you done any studies in that?

Portia Preston: Well, what I can tell you, you know, from teaching cultural humility, when you have an individualistic culture like the United States, right?

There's absolutely this feeling of isolation that perhaps in other cultures that are more collectivists or communal, there is more community around, you know, um. Certain things and rituals that we may not have. But at the same time I think there's a lot of agency on a positive side in, um, our culture.

And for some people, maybe they don't want to tell someone what's really going on with them, right? Mm-hmm. So I think there's something to learn from all of them. But the universal struggle, I think is where the official care [00:10:00] ends. How do we pick up that slack, not just as an individual, but as a community, right?

Having the caregiving that you need and all these other aspects to tie into it. So I don't think any, it's easy for anyone necessarily, but in the states, yes, we have unique problems because we have our. Insurance issues and, you know yeah, yeah,

Scott Maderer: you have a whole nother set of battles to fight on top of, top of health.

But I

Portia Preston: think that we all can, um, you know, bottom line, we can benefit from community and empathy and what we're going through.

Scott Maderer: Yeah. Yeah. I, I think too because I'm a coach and I work with international clients, you know, I get exposed to a lot of different cultures, a lot of different parts of the world, and one of the things that I've.

Discovered over the years is, it's not that something's better or worse, it's just that it's different, you know? And, and it's gonna come with its own set of challenges. Yeah. And it's also gonna come with its own set of advantages, right. Because I think all too often we compare it and we go, we cherry pick, you know, we look at all the good stuff.

[00:11:00] And something else and look at all the bad stuff that we're undergoing and go see it's better. It's like, eh, it's different. You know? There's gonna be some of each, so, yeah. So talk a little bit, one of the things I like to highlight is kind of what I call the intersection between our, our faith journey and our life journey and, and kind of how that feeds back and forth one into the other.

So share a little bit about how, as you've gone through both the education and, and your other experiences, how that, how that has kind of played out.

Portia Preston: Yeah, so Faith was very central in my life growing up. I think it formed a lot of my perspective on the world and my purpose and how I navigate it. So it probably had a lot to do with me wanting to serve people first as a doctor and then through public health and you know now as a professor and an author.

So I definitely have this outward focus and this feeling of responsibility to humanity. To do the best I can and leave some benefit behind. On a personal level, I would say that the past couple of years and [00:12:00] maybe a lot of people can resonate to this, we've been initiated to struggles that we've never imagined, and that has truly rocked my faith because I think it's one thing when I'm 14 years old in high school to say, trust in the Lord with all my heart and lean onto to my own understanding.

It's a totally different thing to say that now, and I'm, it's humbling. Because what I'm realizing is surrender has to be a daily practice. Every day I have to say, oh, there's your ego trying to convince you that you've got this again, and you've gotta take all of this and lay it at God's feet, and you are not prepared to wear this anxiety.

Also this idea that you are universally loved. I, I think that when we really embrace that, that drives so much of the transformation. And so for me at this point, it's really inseparable. And that doesn't mean that I can't talk about principles with other communities 'cause I [00:13:00] absolutely do.

But for my personal life, I. I can't see doing any aspect of my personal and professional journey without my faith being central.

Scott Maderer: So let's talk a little bit about the book hustle Flow or Let It Go and hustle of course, is. A buzzword a lot of times in, in today's parlance you know, hustle and grind, right?

You know you can sleep when you're dead. Uh, so talk a little bit about what you've learned about wellness and the narratives that are out there. Yeah. And whether you wanna call it toxic wellness or you, what, what's out there that you've discovered maybe, maybe isn't serving us as well as we think.

Portia Preston: Sure. I, I love that you started with the whole, you can sleep when you're dead. Because that really was my rabbit hole in, I was thinking, well, this is definitely going to do it, you know? Yeah. [00:14:00] And you'll get there soon.

Scott Maderer: Yeah.

Portia Preston: And you know, for me, I wanted. To be such a high achiever. And that was so much of my identity and as I've dealt with different health issues and most recently my neurodivergence, I'm realizing I can't function in the reality where that is who I am.

And so I now understand I have a tendency to hustle, but I really have to have parameters around it and I need to be intentional about it. And one of the ways that I do that is by realizing that most of the expectations that we have of ourselves are not original. Most of them are something that we've learned from our families, our culture, our society, some kind of system.

So the first step is to realize that really everyone has a product to sell, even if it's just, Hey, this is the way that you should live your life. And we have to have safety with ourselves to be able to explore whether or not something's actually working for us. And I think the toxic [00:15:00] wellness I doesn't, I think there's a lot of benefit in a lot of the wellness conversation.

But it benefits from nuance, right? And so anything that you take to an extreme is gonna be harmful for you. But I think that we have been taught to produce as much as we can. And so we've thought about wellness in the same way, right? If you pursue wellness the hardest you can, then that is going to make your life.

Better, and it doesn't necessarily do that. So I kind of turn wellness on its head, and I say the role of wellness in my life is to meet me where I am right now, no matter what is happening, if I am grieving. Okay. Then wellness is being able to feel my grief, right? Getting the support that I need to do that, but also understanding that I can invite joy in and it doesn't mean that I'm not.

Sad, but I understand that joy is part of what makes that bearable. So I think of wellness as more of something that we are worthy of as a daily, lifelong practice, rather than a goal to [00:16:00] be achieved.

Scott Maderer: It, it's sort of the, the sense of. You know, like I talk about the distinction between joy and happiness.

Mm-hmm. You know, good job. And, you know, happy happiness is that in the moment, you know, momentary. Right. You know? Right. Somebody gave me a gift. Oh wow, that's cool. You know, and it's here and it's gone, you know? Mm-hmm. Where Joy is, the well today sucks, but I can still find some, some joy in it. You know, I can still find that one moment that's there.

Portia Preston: There's, there's a Bible verse that's really challenging me when it comes to joy. And it, it has to do with Jesus on the cross and it says, for the joy that was set before him, he endured the cross and scorned its shame. And I've dealt with the endure the cross part because that's, you know, understanding your struggle's not about you.

You know, you do a great job of highlighting this in your book. You're very great at pulling out the nuance and saying, Hey, we're going to go through struggles, right? I'm not promising you a [00:17:00] struggle free life, scor. The shame is saying, I'm not going to internalize what society is telling me. Rejecting a societal narrative that because you're on this cross, it means you're a terrible person.

Well take that to everything that we go through in our personal professional lives. We give ourselves shame for. That is my struggle. I'm gonna score and it's shame. The part that I struggle with is this idea that. How do you make palpable this joy that is set before you? And I think we do it through the practice of worship and prayer and connection and thinking about the positive.

And I think that the ego is meant to wrestle with that because the ego wants to do something once and have it be done. But I think that in order to make that tangible for myself. I must constantly repeat my repeat to myself, what is this joy? What is this hope? And remember that it's beyond this world, so that then I don't have the expectations of the world, as you said, bringing me [00:18:00] this static enduring state of happiness.

Yeah,

Scott Maderer: yeah. I'm, I'm there. I, I've, like you said, I've, I've got it, I've got it down. You know, I, I about the time that you figure out all the answers, everybody changes the questions. So, you know, it's like, I dunno, at least that's been my experience. Yeah.

Portia Preston: I, I, I definitely feel like somebody came along and shuffled the multiple choice options again.

Um, and it's humbling. I, I think the process of integration is such that sometimes we feel like we're really going backwards and we don't really perceive that we are getting the message in at a deeper level.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm. Uh, the, the framework that I, I talk about in my coaching and, and is refocus, gain control, set a plan, but then I like to emphasize, but that's not a straight line, that's a circle, right?

Because about the time you get the plan set. Yes, some changes, you know, and you gotta refocus all over again and do it all over again. And I think [00:19:00] that happens in our, our wellness journeys too.

Portia Preston: Yes. Well, would you mind if I talk about one of the frameworks that I have that

Scott Maderer: Absolutely.

Portia Preston: The goal of my book is to help people develop this wellness blueprint that is sustainable, that honors their reality so they don't feel like they have to change anything to get to it, right? And I do that by having them go through this four step process I call sane. And the first step is just to slow down and reflect.

So that is a process of just getting grounded and connected with yourself and coming into the present moment. The next part, acknowledge your reality. That's actually very hard for

Scott Maderer: us. Yep. I'd rather not thank you,

Portia Preston: and I was so grateful that, you know, you talked about, you know, the ton beliefs because that is actually a big struggle for me right now.

I have to acknowledge that my reality right now is I am having some struggles with these cognitive restructuring, you know? And um, I have to parse out for [00:20:00] myself what is true and then what is this worst case scenario that I'm envisioning, right? And understanding that for me, I'm going to have to do that repeatedly.

So then the next step navigate with intention. Now that I understand my reality, I understand the resource I have access to. Is what I'm doing actually aligned with my values?

Has that shifted for me? And if this is still what I want and it's aligned with my values, I can have my milestone, I can have my outcome in mind, but really I need to focus on a few tiny steps just to get that momentum going.

And then I move on to the e part, evaluate and adapt. Because what I know from my life is if I say I'm gonna do something, there's about 20 hidden steps there that I don't know about. I find that I want to give up when I realize, oh, you didn't predict that perfectly. That's not realistic. So that evaluate and adapt part is so important for us to understand.

You're gonna have to be flexible about this [00:21:00] and also maybe not attached to it so that if it turns out to be something that's not in the cards, you haven't ed your whole identity on it.

Scott Maderer: Yeah. And I think part of that too, in the adapt thing, and I see this in a lot of folks, is. Oftentimes our future self gets mad at our past, past self for not knowing something that past self didn't know, you know?

But now future self has learned it, and future self is like, well, why didn't you know this? And it's like, well. Because they didn't know it. You know,

Portia Preston: that I did not know I was coming here to get picked on. I did not know you were gonna come here and tell my story now.

Scott Maderer: But we do, we do that. We all do it.

Portia Preston: That's, I feel that so tenderly because that's me every day. Yeah. And it's so unfair. Yeah.

Scott Maderer: It's literally blaming yourself for not knowing. The future and [00:22:00] I in, in a way that's actually very prideful to think that we should know the future,

Portia Preston: you know, but we're future oriented because there's this clash between, I think what has been required of us to evolve and what is required for us to mature spiritually.

That is the thorn in the flesh, right? If you didn't think about the morning, you may not have made it through the night. But now you can't predict with certainty, right? And so these, these wonderful instincts are a little maladaptive for us now, and I think that's why we need shared humanity. We need conversations like what you do here on your podcast and your coaching so that people can realize, wait a minute.

I'm not the only person and we keep going around saying that we're making mistakes, but we didn't know we were doing the best that we could in that moment. And yeah, maybe I did something wrong and I need to take accountability. But what I really need to do and what I always tell people, like my model right now live from here.

Don't [00:23:00] sit here and try to even out the scorecard with yourself and ask yourself what you did wrong? Like, you're here now. What?

Scott Maderer: Yeah. Yeah. And, and it's, some of it's just where are you gonna put the focus and the energy, you know, are, are you gonna put all of your energy on the rear view mirror and looking at what has happened?

And, and it's not, don't put any energy there. Again, we're back to that balance thing. You know, it's, think of driving a car, you gotta look at the rear view mirror some or else it's bad, but you put most of your time and energy looking out the front.

Portia Preston: I will be honest with you, and I, I think really honest with you, sometimes I know I'm in a moment where all I'm going to do Sure is sit there and look at the past, and I wanna fess up to that so that if that is hard for someone and they get stuck there sometimes they understand that is human right.

Mm-hmm. But I think what you're alluding to is consistency, beating this determination because it's anchored in your values. If you have this value of I will live [00:24:00] forward and I will forgive myself, and I will seek to do better, right then you're going to keep going and moving forward, and I think that is the true.

Path, not the linear path that we imagine. Right. Yeah. It, it's that's the journey, you know, not, it's not the destination that's the journey because, you know, on to perfection or, you know, move forward In faith it's not, yeah, it is messy and imperfect. All but you things, but you pick up

a good point.

Perfection is something that lays outside of ourselves, and really what we're talking about there is wholeness. Integrity. Yeah. Yes. You know, and inter, and, and people forget that the word integrity and integer, you know, that that comes from the same route. It does mean wholeness. That's what integrity means.

Scott Maderer: And yet we've come to use it a different way and kind of lost track of that.

Portia Preston: Would you mind breaking down for me what [00:25:00] you think we think integrity is?

Scott Maderer: Well, I think a lot of times people think of integrity as things like being honest. Yeah. Being truthful. Yeah. Um and, and I'm not saying that's not a component of it.

Right. But that's not the whole picture. Mm-hmm. It's it integrity or integral. Mm-hmm. To be whole. And, and that's the other thing. I think even if you get to that point and start realizing it means wholeness. We think of wholeness as everything is good. That's what I was gonna talk about.

And I, I ain't

Portia Preston: want

Scott Maderer: wholeness means either

Portia Preston: that to me now, I, I think we can merge wholeness and honesty. Right. Because that means that we are looking at everything and we're saying, in this life, you will have joy and pain. Right there, there will be this, this shadow that you have to push through because a lot of, um.

Where we are going spiritually, we can't get to any other way. Right. And, and so when we [00:26:00] have a faith that can only exist when things are good, it's gonna be very hard. And so to me, maybe when we're not in integrity, the lie is only part. So when we're telling ourselves that we're shameful and we're terrible and we don't deserve anything, we aren't looking at our whole selves.

Mm-hmm. So I think that's actually really beautiful the way you brought those two together. Yeah,

Scott Maderer: it is. It is. The, the whole thing. And it, and I'll go further. I think it's also, it's the flip of shame, meaning

yes,

we could also have those moments where, you know, man, I've got it all figured out.

Everything's all put together, and, you know, and, and, you know and wow, I've deserved this because, you know, and, and that's not. Gotta be

Portia Preston: the truth forever, either. The worst place to be in it really is because you're going to get knocked off and you're gonna be completely disoriented if you made the mistake of thinking that that's who you really are.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm. [00:27:00] Let's talk for folks. You know, we we've talked along about wellness and things, but go in your book, what are some of the things that you share or, you know, somebody that's hearing all of this is going, yeah, I need this. Where do they start? You know, what, what, what's the beginning?

Sure.

Portia Preston: Well, I, you know, I started off by saying that our entry point to this journey is grace. And I spent about a good five pages confiding to people just how like. Broken and human. I am as the next person, and I have this little manifesto about shame-free wellness, and I, I'd like to tell your Sure, your listeners a little bit about it.

You were taught that loving yourself is vain and selfish to confirm other people's expectations until you lost sight of yourself, to express yourself in ways that were socially acceptable rather than healthy. To silence your intuition, to chase external validation, to chase your status driven connections instead of genuine acceptance [00:28:00] and love, and to shrink yourself and avoid failure even at the cost of your dreams.

So this is really a call to an authenticity that we've been afraid of. Because we think that apart from what society tells us we need, we are nothing. And it's flipping all of that and saying no. The whole way they were able to create shame is to tell you that you were supposed to be something other than you are.

So the whole concept of shame-free wellness is that in every single area of your life, you are deserving. Of feeling whole and in integrity. And it's not about reaching these perfect standards and having these perfect practices, but it is saying even if you're going through tremendous struggle, you deserve joy and you deserve for us to come together and work on those issues.

You shouldn't be told to self-care yourself out of things that are collective problems. So I spend a lot of time talking about how inclusive wellness is the individual and the collective. One of the chapters I talk about cognitive wellness and my focus is on honoring your [00:29:00] unique brain because for a lot of people that are neurodivergent like myself, we feel like we're not quite whole.

Scott Maderer: And

Portia Preston: there's something wrong with us, and that's because we live in a society where I was thinking about it today, we're almost standing on a bosu ball and it's just tipping in all directions. You know, if you put a Bosu ball upside down and has your balance that's

what we feel like walking through daily life and we're just trying to tip and turn and you know, function normally.

And there's a lot of shame that comes from that. So this is really about being able to honor all aspects of yourself and to be able to honor that in other people with compassion.

Scott Maderer: And, you know, neurodivergence I think is so important today too, in realizing the truth is that a lot of times people feel like, oh, this is something new.

And it's like, no, it's not new. We just, we've just learned better language to talk about it. But you know, people say, you know, there autism didn't [00:30:00] exist back in the old days. It's like, okay, my great grandfather, and I am not kidding, the man would eat one food at a time. He would go get one food, put it on his plate, eat all of that food, then go get another food.

'cause he could not stand the concept of two foods touching. Yeah. Yeah and people are like. Yeah, that's just eccentric. I'm like, no, it's not. The man was on the spectrum. Okay. Yeah. You know, and he has passed it down because so is I, you know? Yes. You know, and now mine is different, but there's things that you know, and yet, but we wouldn't have called it that back then.

No. You know, he didn't have any treatment for that or help for that or recognition of. Of that

Portia Preston: it, it's incredible to have someone like you even talking about it because I feel like we still have so far to go. Oh, absolutely. In terms of people being able to acknowledge it. And for someone like myself, I was really hesitant to even [00:31:00] accept the label because I felt like I was drawing attention from oth away from other people.

A lot of people spend a lot of time telling me that I couldn't be neurodivergent because of what I had accomplished.

Scott Maderer: Right.

Portia Preston: And what I know. You've got a degree, you've got to college, you can't Yeah. I'm like, oh well. Little secret here. I think that academia is full of neurodiversity. Yeah.

Scott Maderer: We like it there.

It's safe and predictable.

Portia Preston: We get a lot of autonomy and what's been really wonderful for my students now, you know, they're younger and they're really honest about this, right? And so they're coming in the door saying, I know I struggle with these things. And so when they have a professor who says, you know, I struggle with executive function and this is what makes this difficult for me, and I can understand why this would be hard for you to start your assignment.

They're like, oh my god. You're not telling me I'm lazy. Yeah. You actually believe me. And I go, yes, you have 10 million distractions. This is hard. It's harder than it was for me. I didn't have a cell phone. [00:32:00] I,

I think

Scott Maderer: y you, you didn't have somebody buzzing in you 24 7 No. You know, in your year 24 7.

Portia Preston: Right. And so I think the biggest lesson I've learned is in order for us to come together and really like, think in an inclusive way, we want to be able to acknowledge everybody exactly where they are labels or not, and say what are the supports that will help you to be able to function and. The role that you are in and, and what changes can we make?

And a lot of the changes that we made in society benefit everyone. You know, the, the curb. Being accommodating for wheelchairs also makes it easier for anybody else that wants to roll a cart and text messaging. Originally for people that were mm-hmm. Hard of hearing. Now most people would not want that.

So I think if we can start to understand that these sensitivities are clues to what might make our way to a better humanity, we really can have a broader conversation and we think [00:33:00] about all the differences that we have through that same light.

Scott Maderer: Mm-hmm. Well, and I think a lot of times too because again, like saying, you know, I don't want to accept that label, it.

We all get labeled with labels. You know, sometimes it's recognizing that the labels that you had weren't accurate. There's a different set of labels. Right? So like what you just said about the student, oh, you're not calling me lazy. Think about that. That means they've had that label

Portia Preston: Oh my god.

Scott Maderer: In their head of, you know, I'm not struggling with executive function.

I'm lazy.

Portia Preston: Yeah. Or I'm dumb. I can't learn. I, I'm not a good reader. And, and that's why by the way, my chapters are in the style of these three to five page mini retreats. Even I, as an author, I struggle to read if they're not frequent. Breaks in my writing and I have to say, your book, by the way, passes that test.

Yeah. Because you've got these little boxes and sections and I [00:34:00] appreciate that. But if someone like me who is a professor can say that visual guides help me to focus, yes. My students are gonna feel much more empowered to be able to do that. Mm-hmm. And ask for the same.

Scott Maderer: Yeah. So I've, I've got a few questions that I like to ask all of my guests, but uh, before I go there, I could, 'cause I could already tell, we could talk for the next four and a half hours and I don't wanna do that to the listeners.

So, uh, speaking of dating frequent breaks, but before I ask you those questions, is there anything else a, about your book or this work that you do around wellness that you would Yeah. Think. To share. I,

Portia Preston: I would love to share with your audience that hustle flow or let it go really seeks to meet them exactly where they are.

So whether they are caregivers in the sandwich generation, they also have children to care for burnout. I talk about it in the context of work, but also relationships and illness. And so I really thought of it as a choose your own adventure. For the person who feels frustrated because they haven't been able to [00:35:00] apply the 10 steps that, you know, they've picked up along the way.

And so it goes through different areas of wellness. It talks about the different resources. Like time and, and money. And we don't make assumptions about how much of it you have, but really thinking about what can we offer at the individual level to ourselves to care for ourselves as best we can?

And then how do we operate as a community to help each other to improve our collective wellbeing? So what they will get is little mini retreats that they can enjoy anywhere. They can close the door in the bathroom for five minutes and read one. That is fine. And um, at the end they'll have a blueprint of sustainable practices.

And they have this same framework that they can use any day, any week, any year for a shame-free reset.

And the last thing I always tell people is that they are worthy. Period.

Scott Maderer: Yeah. I'm gonna call out too 'cause I've, I've read the book and one of the things I appreciate about it [00:36:00] is, and, and you've used the word several times, the fact that it takes a framework approach, not a process approach.

Mm-hmm. Um, and I tried to do that in my book as well and I share with people the reason why is. Processes work if you're starting at the same point and have the same goal.

Unfortunately, not all of us start at the same point and have the same goal. So frameworks, however, apply regardless of where you are.

You know, it, it, they, they, that's a, a way of thinking about the world that, you know, you could be at a completely different place and have a completely different goal and. Unlike a lot of books that are about wellness and things like that, this is a, a framework driven book, not a process driven book. Um, so it could kind of help wherever you're at.

So

Portia Preston: may, may I add one more thing? I know we're sure

Scott Maderer: moving quickly,

Portia Preston: but I, I just wanna make sure I give people context for the title. You know, the hustle. Yes, it's the pace and the intensity that you're doing things, but it's also the struggles that you have that are placed upon you that you don't always have a choice about, and [00:37:00] it's not here to tell you not to hustle.

It's here to help you be intentional and aware and understand the warning signs and how it impacts you. Flow is any practice that is sustainable. Supportive of your long-term wellbeing across the different areas of wellness and then let it go is always the hardest part. And I tell people, that's why there's a question mark there.

It's just acknowledging things that are beyond our control or something that is, you know. Toxic and it's understanding. You deserve to have healthy boundaries. You deserve to be able to decide what is best for you. And so it really is there to help support you in making the decisions that are best for you.

But this is really a decisional tool for you to use so you can think in any situation, where's the hustle? Where can I find some flow, and what's do I need to let go of?

Scott Maderer: Absolutely. So my brand has inspired stewardship and I kind of run things through that lens of, of stewardship. Yeah. And yet I've discovered over the years that that word means a lot of different things to a lot of different people.

Yeah. Yeah. So for you, when you hear the [00:38:00] word stewardship, what does it mean to you?

Portia Preston: Well, fortunately I prepared for this. I did go back and look at the etymology, and I was very surprised because I found myself really embracing this. It had come up as a value for me. And I went, how is that my value? And what I realized is for me.

It's living with compassion and all things that I do, and I thought, wow, I can take what I try to do in one area of my life and really just make it about the broader point. So I would say that for me, I am a steward of the talents that have been given to me and beyond that, I believe that my role is to love.

To give and receive, you know, love to experience life. But bottom line, I think I'm a steward of love.

Scott Maderer: Awesome. So this is my favorite question that I like to ask everybody. Imagine for a moment that I could invent this magic machine, and with this machine, I was [00:39:00] able to take you from where you are today and transport you into the future.

Maybe 150, maybe 250 years. But through the power of this machine, you're able to look back and see your entire life. Mm-hmm. See all of the, all of the ripples, all of the connections, all of the impacts you've left. What impact do you hope you've left in the world?

Speaker 3: The ripple effect of love. The idea that

Portia Preston: me spending time with someone or pouring into them made them feel 1% better, and that they took that into everything else that they did in life.

Scott Maderer: So what's on the roadmap? What's coming next for you as you continue on this journey?

Portia Preston: I, for me, I'm learning to live my life at an intentional pace that's good for me right now. So I feel like I'm a bit more grounded and I am looking forward to being blessed with bigger opportunities to share this with the world.

So I think what I'm doing with you, I am doing what I [00:40:00] intend to, um, extending this message beyond myself. And so I look forward to just being able to offer it on different, you know. Stages so it can reach people that need it. And probably writing a future book. As scary as that sounds for us book writers it's already in there for me.

So, um, continuing to spread my message and yeah, I'm just gonna leave it there.

Scott Maderer: Yeah, I, I think it, it, it's unfortunate. Unfortunate that, uh, usually writing the first book is the hard, but then you get the bug and it's like, oh, I've got another book. Oh, I've got another book. Oh, I've got another. Yeah. That's a good thing, bad thing kind of moment.

Yeah.

Portia Preston: I think I wanna take some courage from my younger self when I was working for, um. The federal government and I decided to go back to school. I ran into a lot of people who said, I thought about doing that too, but I, I feel like I'm too old for that. And I told them that time [00:41:00] is gonna pass regardless.

Mm-hmm. And you have to think about, do I wanna have this when that time comes. And so I think for me, if I wasn't trying this hard, I would be doing a different hard.

Scott Maderer: And and not doing something is sometimes harder than doing it. Exactly. Honestly, in terms of the I have do something

best.

Yeah.

Because yeah, not making a decision is making a decision. Exactly. Yeah. So you can find out more about Portia over and or Book Hustle Flow, or Let it go over@porschepreston.com. Of course I'll have the links to that in the show notes, so if you can't find it or if you're driving right now and, and can't write it down, come over there and you'll be able to find it there.

Is there anything else you'd like to share with the listener?

Portia Preston: I appreciate the time that I've had today and if they would like to follow me on my socials, it's Dr. Pia Preston and they can see where I am going to speak next. And [00:42:00] coach and do retreats. So thank you so much for having this time with me today.

Scott Maderer: Absolutely. Thank you for being here.

So much for listening to the Inspired Stewardship Podcast. As a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just [00:43:00] sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you enjoyed this episode please do us a favor. Go over to inspired stewardship.com/itunes.

Rate all one word. iTunes rate. It'll take you through how to leave a rating and review, and how to make sure you're subscribed to the podcast so that you can get every episode as it comes out in your feed. Until next time, invest your time, your talent, and your treasures. Develop your influence and impact the world.