Episode 1314: Interview with Becca Powers about Balancing Self-Worth and Net-Worth

[00:00:00] Scott Maderer: Thanks for joining us on episode 1,314 of the Inspired Stewardship Podcast.

[00:00:07] Becca Powers: I'm Becca Powers. I challenge you to invest in yourself, invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent, and your treasures to live out your calling. Having the ability to find real success and happiness is key, and one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this The Inspired Stewardship Podcast with my friend Scott Maderer.

[00:00:45] It was an extreme example of surrender, but in that moment, I had nowhere else to go, so I would straight up and I was just like, I don't even know how to get myself off the floor. I don't even know how to do [00:01:00] tomorrow differently. All I know is that I can't do the same thing I'm doing today.

[00:01:07] Scott Maderer: Welcome and thank you for joining us on the Inspired Stewardship Podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent, and your treasures for your true calling. In the Inspired Stewardship Podcast, you will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others, and develop your influence so that you can.

[00:01:32] The world.

[00:01:38] In today's podcast episode, I interview Becca Powers. I ask Becca to share with you her journey from leadership to coaching. I also ask Becca about how you can maintain your self-worth and your wellbeing, and I also asked Becca to talk with you about how your self worth connects to your net. One reason I like to bring you great [00:02:00] interviews like the one you're gonna hear today is because of the power in learning from others.

[00:02:06] Another great way to learn from others is through reading books. But if you're like most people today, you find it hard to find the time to sit down and read, and that's why today's podcast is brought to you by Audible. Go to inspired stewardship.com/audible to sign up and you can get a 30 day free trial.

[00:02:26] There's over 180,000 titles to choose from, and instead of reading, you can listen your way to learn from some of the greatest minds out there. That's inspired stewardship.com/audible to get your free trial and listen to great books the same way you're listening to this podcast. Becca Powers is an award-winning high-tech sales executive and motivational speaker.

[00:02:51] With over 20 years of experience, her career boast Fortune 500 Giants such as Dell and Cisco. From growing up with musician parents who flirted [00:03:00] with addiction to dropping out of college and becoming a single parent of two by the age of 28, Becca's Guts and Grit journey to Success reaches beyond business as a motivational speaker, she empowers women to prioritize themselves for more fulfill.

[00:03:15] Joyful life. Welcome to the show, Becca.

[00:03:18] Becca Powers: Thank you for

[00:03:19] Scott Maderer: having me, Scott. Absolutely. Would, we talked a little bit in the intro about some of the things you've done in your career and coming to this point where you are today. But would you talk a little bit more that transition and what happened in your journey that brought you to shift from the leadership work you were doing to.

[00:03:42] Working with other leaders, being a life coach, being a speaker, writing, doing these things.

[00:03:49] Becca Powers: I think it really comes down to overworking myself and I fell to the, I'm gonna give the backstory, but I just [00:04:00] like for the punch, like I worked myself, I was a sales leader and I worked myself to the point of collapsing to on the bathroom floor out of shared exhaustion.

[00:04:11] Powerlessness helplessness. And here I am an empowered woman who's dominating the tech industry as a sales leader and all of that stuff. And yet I'm laying on the bathroom floor. What got me there and what I can say now is, I was chasing success and I think you'll relate to this a lot just because of when I feel like when you're service-based or mission-based or purpose-based in your work you tend to sacrifice yourself not intentionally.

[00:04:48] It's for good reason. It's because you're for me, I was a leader, so I'm and the organization I worked for had a mantra of putting people first. And so for me, being a service-based leader, that felt [00:05:00] incredibly purposeful. So I poured my heart and soul into that role. I poured my heart and soul into my team.

[00:05:06] I was also the primary breadwinner. Working felt like that's the way that I am making my. And what I didn't realize is that in the pursuit of all the things, I wasn't on the priority list. And just to sum up the things, yeah, like all the other things got my attention and When I, when everything collapsed, literally.

[00:05:35] I had come home from work after like my fourth 12 hour bad day in a row, exhausted, running on empty. And it's not my proudest

[00:05:45] moment,

[00:05:46] Becca Powers: I'm just gonna share that with you. But I walked through the door. I've got my kids were in middle school, then we have a blended family. I have two. He husband has two.

[00:05:55] My all four were home. They're happy to see me. My kids run up to me and they're like, mom, [00:06:00] let me tell you about our day. I had noth no resource left. So I snapped and I was like, can I put my freaking purse down? Mommy needs five minutes. And I remember there was those moments in time where things just freeze frame and all of a sudden you get perspective.

[00:06:18] And I saw their smiles go to frowns. I still get the goosebumps to this day, and this was several years ago. I saw their excitement go to shame like that They even approached. And in that moment I was like who have I become? Who am I as a person? Is this the mother I wanna be? Obviously the answer was no.

[00:06:38] And then I was like, how did I get here? And that later that night when I was replaying everything and I'm realizing that what I'm missing most is presence for myself and presence for my kids, which are the most important things. I. And complete, like I had nothing left. So I'll pause there [00:07:00] cuz there's lot to chew on.

[00:07:02] Scott Maderer: So y I think and I can relate in some ways. I had the high I was a school teacher for 16 years. That burns you out. I then became a corporate executive for 11 years. Rose up into senior management, had a team of 20 leaders reporting to me who all had people reporting to them.

[00:07:23] I'm in charge of big budget flying all around the country to meet with clients. All of this stuff. Everyone looks at it and goes, wow you've got a dream job. You get paid high six figures, you know all of them. Wow. How awesome. And I'm like, yeah. And I love it.

[00:07:38] I really do. I love it. Me too. I also hate every minute. At the same time because I'm coming home and I haven't seen my wife for three weeks, so I haven't seen my son for three weeks. And and when I get home I'm so exhausted, I can't really be with them. And we can't I don't wanna do anything.

[00:07:56] I just wanna sit in bed. How do you think [00:08:00] cuz you mentioned you weren't even sure how you got there. How do we get there? You know what I mean?

[00:08:06] Becca Powers: I feel we get there. For good reason. I always just so for all the listeners, it goes back to what I say, like I think. Many of us are doing the actions that we are because we think they're the right ones.

[00:08:23] We think we're supporting our family, or we think we're supporting the business. And so there's this level, like we're soul driven. They're, we're, even if people aren't tapped into that part of themselves, that's the stuff that makes us tick. And so then we get into this autopilot mode. And then you mentioned burnout.

[00:08:39] So then there's the shadowy side of why we go on autopilot because we're afraid of getting fired. Things like that. But on either side of the spectrum, whether it's purpose-driven and you're just ignoring you're working yourself to bone or you're more on the fear-based side of you're undervalued, underappreciated, and you find yourself overstressing and [00:09:00] overwhelming either way that takes you away from yourself.

[00:09:05] We're not prioritizing ourselves. So if I was to tell the listeners, like, how would you avoid. That. I would say that there's an, and there's a world that lives where you can prioritize yourself and your wellbeing, and also make an impact, be purpose-driven, be service-based, and have more peace and joy and love, and all the things that you're really craving.

[00:09:31] Scott Maderer: Yeah. The, so the listeners of the show are familiar if they've been listening for a while, if this is your first time, you'll have to tune back in and listen. I, one of the themes that I talk a lot about is what I talk about is living in the world of both and instead of either or cuz we tend to make things either or.

[00:09:48] I can either succeed at work or I can see to succeed at home. There's no possible way I could do both of. It was like why not? Yes,

[00:09:59] Becca Powers: [00:10:00] exactly. And it was the, and I even, I wrote a chapter about it in my book, but I called it The Power of, and because there are two things that, and I'll pause for a question so we can go deeper in this, but there, I think there was two things that had me rise and Are definitely crucial to why I'm passionate about the work that I do today.

[00:10:26] And one is I had to surrender, which is really tricky for people who have control issues. I had to surrender and I had to embrace the power of and those two components change the trajectory of my life. Okay. When you say surrender, I think that's an immediately a word that has all sorts of connotations to it.

[00:10:49] Scott Maderer: How do you define that when you talk about surrender, what do you mean?

[00:10:55] Becca Powers: I'm so glad you say that because I, until I personally experienced, I [00:11:00] thought like surrender forgiveness, some of these words we talk about all the time, but like, how do you do it and why do you do it? And it was very confusing to me, even though I'm a Christian, I have a yogi, so we talk about surrender all the time, but I tell you this, when you fall to the bathroom floor and you don't have the physical.

[00:11:22] To pull yourself up. The only place to go to is God. And that was, it was an extreme example of surrender, but in that moment, I had nowhere else to go. So I would straight up and I was just like, I don't even know how to get myself off the floor. I don't even know how to. Tomorrow differently. All I know is that I can't do the same thing I'm doing today.

[00:11:50] And that I, I say I get the goosebumps just telling this story because I'm very passionate about it. I feel that there's a power and [00:12:00] surrender. There's a power and prayer that when it's genuine and you move your ego out of the way, I got an instant miracle and it came in the form of a thought and it was a former VP of sales had told me.

[00:12:13] Years before, like Becca, you're the c e o of your life. And so that's the thought that came to me when I'm laying powerless on the bathroom floor, I'm the c e o of my life and I'm like, oh my God, if I'm the c e o of my life, then why am I powerless on the bathroom floor? I have a lot more control and power in this than I thought I had.

[00:12:32] And like a fire within me lit and I rose a different woman than the one that went down like it was a within.

[00:12:42] Scott Maderer: Yeah. And that's one of those questions, right? If you were the boss of your life, would you fire you? It's like sometimes it's oh wait. Yeah. Yeah, I really would.

[00:12:57] You mentioned having that moment of faith [00:13:00] and reaching out to God and that low point. Can you talk a little bit about your faith journey and how that kind of intersected with your life, both before and after and, You

[00:13:11] Becca Powers: know, I think absolutely. And I think faith is also one of those things that can be super tricky, even though it's not meant to be.

[00:13:20] I've always been a very faithful person, very spiritually connected, and I would say that I was so spiritually connected when just praying and seeing signs and doing all those things that I. And not in a good way. There's always a put God first as a saying, but I put God first to the point that I put my, that I don't know that I was in the equation at all.

[00:13:46] And so when I hit the bathroom floor, what I realized is that for, to really support me in my journey. And to do all the mission-based [00:14:00] work, purposeful work that I thought I needed to do, I had to allow myself to be prioritized first. And how this insight came to me was that I'm a mother, I've got kids.

[00:14:12] I was like, I would never want my kids to put. Me before themselves, I would want them to put themselves first and come to me and say, mom, I could use your support, whether it be financially or emotionally, or physically, whatever that is. And then I'm gonna help my kids get their goals. I'm gonna help them achieve, I'm gonna help them.

[00:14:30] And when I allowed God to be that role for me, my conception of faith shifted. And it gave more space for me to co. With God and feel supported. It gave me permission to prioritize my wellbeing and not feel that my purpose or my mission had to come first. And actuality, if I took care of myself, it gave me so much more energy to do the things [00:15:00] that I wanted to do.

[00:15:00] And so now just wrapping up that question, I feel that I live from that. I would say at least 80% of the time. We're human, but

[00:15:11] Scott Maderer: Yeah. And it, I again, it's never so I, I'm of the Methodist tradition and John Wesley, me too, founder of Methodism. And his thing it, the, his famous, one of his famous sermons, there's a lot, but one of his famous sermons is about on to perfection.

[00:15:27] And that idea of, as Christians we're moving. On to perfection. That means we have it arrived. We're never there, but we're going that that's the goal, right? Is to go that direction. It's not you got there it's how do we go there? Which is a subtle idea, but it's our difference.

[00:15:47] But it's it is important. When you think about that. You know that idea of, because we're told focus on others and that's important. And we're [00:16:00] told focus on God and that's important. And we wanna focus on our family and that's important. And yet, like you said, there's still a need to, which at the end of the day, if we don't take care of ourselves then all those other things fall aside too.

[00:16:14] You know how today do. Work on balancing and balancing, I hate that word actually. Let me change it. How do you work on keeping harmony between those different parts of your life? Which is a better word?

[00:16:28] Becca Powers: I'm so shocked right now because I also replace balance with the word harmony in all my teachings.

[00:16:34] I just think that harmony is the key, and so I'm so glad you asked that. Because there's a harmony within us. I think that on a very practical level, even like the listeners right now I always, I like to put my left hand on my heart and my right hand on my gut, and when I'm making decisions, tune into myself does this give me the butterflies?

[00:16:56] Does it make me feel excited? Does it make me feel happy? Does it make me feel [00:17:00] like I'm supporting myself or supporting someone else? Or does this decision that I'm about to make me feel. Uncomfortable. Does it make me feel sick to my stomach? Does it make me feel stressed that it's going to put more pressure on me than I have time to take?

[00:17:15] And that is harmony and disharmony. One is putting me in harmony with myself and one is putting me in disharmony. And so I really, in, in all of my work, especially with the high achieving A types, they don't really stop to listen to themselves. They make decisions all the time. That they're paid to make decisions.

[00:17:40] This is their role, but they never really stopped to listen to themselves. So if I was to encourage anything to the listeners, there's a harmony. That lies within us, that if you tap into it will guide you to better decision making so that you feel fulfilled and you get to do all the things that we were just talking about.

[00:17:59] Live an [00:18:00] amazing life. A lot of us too, we tie up our self worth in those trappings of success. I've got the. I've got the six figure job. I've got the expense account. I've got the fancy car, I've got the big house, I've got the whatever. And that list is infinite. What do you see folks moving towards?

[00:18:24] Scott Maderer: That helps them get into a more healthy place when that's what we're all told. That's success.

[00:18:33] You

[00:18:33] Becca Powers: know, I would say that really questioning what your definition of success is like starting there, because at one time I was really outward driven with my success and all the things that you just mentioned, but after falling to the floor, that felt very unsuccessful.

[00:18:50] And so I was like, what does success, I had to look at it differently. What does success mean to me? It means that, I am thriving and that I'm healthy. By the time I fell to the bathroom [00:19:00] floor, I had worked myself into two anxiety disorders, adult, A D H D, autoimmune disease. My hair was falling out in clumps.

[00:19:06] Like I could go on and on about the disasters that I had endured, allowed myself to endure. As I'm talking about relating that back to self-worth when you are only driven by outward success, it's really because you don't have a high self-worth. You're driving. But if your self-worth was full, you would.

[00:19:38] Be able to make other decisions. And I'll give you an example to make this clearer for the listeners. So when I fell to the bathroom floor, I realized that I had everything out of whack. I actually decided that, hey, it's my, what is successful to me right now? I made the decision to conversation God.

[00:19:59] Everything [00:20:00] is prioritizing my wellbeing and PR being presence for my family. And still being able to provide, like I was like, and I also need to still do this. What ended up happening is that I demoted myself. I came out of a leadership role. I went into a six figure sales role. It gave me more time freedom, right?

[00:20:16] To be in my new version of success. That success meant that I was prioritizing my wellbeing, my family's happiness, that type of stuff. And as a result, my self-worth increased because I was Now, it's it's like almost like a confidence when you start making a decision. It has a positive outcome, and then you do it again and it has a positive outcome.

[00:20:36] Your confidence increases, and as your confidence increases, your self-worth increases, and there's a interconnectedness between self-worth and net worth. Here's the crazy thing, as my self-worth increased, right? By redefining my definition of success, I started making more money. And that blew my mind.

[00:20:59] So I [00:21:00] know that was a longer answer, but sometimes an example when we're talking about these things that are conceptually hard to grab sometimes is helpful. So

[00:21:08] Scott Maderer: thank well, and it's, thank you. But I think that ending is important because it in a way it in a way, it's almost like when you stop chasing certain things is when they.

[00:21:22] Yes. When we're trying to make it happen it's pushing it away. But when we allow it to happen, it then the natural thing. And that doesn't mean, by the way literally it's not a cosmic vending machine where it's oh, if I do this, then money's just gonna magically show up. That's not the point.

[00:21:42] It may not be money, but it will be something. And oftentimes it's the very thing that you actually really need. You may not have even known it, if that makes sense. Have you

[00:21:53] Becca Powers: experienced It makes a lot of sense because here's the thing, now I'm writing, I'm speaking, I'm coaching, I'm [00:22:00] consulting, and I'm if you follow me back to the beginning of this conversation, I had mentioned I'm mission-based, purpose-based, service-based.

[00:22:08] Now I'm really serving, I can, the people in lifes I touched. When they make their transformation and they come back and they. Oh my gosh. I got to attend my daughter's graduation. We went on a vacation and also I still, I got promoted all what you were talking about, these little nuances.

[00:22:31] When we let go and allow the very thing we want shows up in a way. That's quite honestly, unexpected and

[00:22:40] Scott Maderer: miraculous. Yeah. And again like I work with a lot of folks that, you know, in financial situations and in, in what I call time deficit situations. And it's the same thing there.

[00:22:53] It's a different part of their life, but it's. It usually isn't we [00:23:00] don't have enough time or we don't have enough money. That's usually not really the problem. It feels like that's the problem, but that's not the problem. The problem is that lack of alignment, that lack of harmony, that lack of being able to say, no, this is what I really want.

[00:23:15] And that's a discovery process. It's not like you wake up one day and go, yes, this is it. This is the rest of my life. This is the one. It will be. We often say that, but it's not real. It's not true. It's not it's not really what the rest of our life is gonna look like. We connect the dots in reverse, not

[00:23:30] Becca Powers: forward.

[00:23:31] Exactly. And I would even say to expand on that it, when you begin this journey, it helps you stay and in your present moment a lot more like I. Lofty goals. I have five year goals. I still do my A type things. And then I come back to today and just say how can I show up for myself and show up for others today?

[00:23:55] How can I be a gift today? And I go [00:24:00] back on what you said into harmony. Like what? Actions feel good. And I allow my, allow myself to take inspired action from. The, from what this day is offering me

[00:24:13] Scott Maderer: For this moment in time too. Yeah. And then those goals may end up changing and morphing and adapting and that's okay.

[00:24:22] That's, yeah. It's holding things with an open hand, so it's not Yes. You're still holding them. But you're also allowing them to move

[00:24:30] Becca Powers: and then Yes. And I know this is a faith-based podcast, so I'll just say it like God's plan is far better than mine. Let me just tell you like the, what I've learned over time is that I can do these five years plans and then if I have allowance and harmony and inspired action, they come out 10 times better than what I could ever have done on my own.

[00:24:51] Scott Maderer: So I've got a few questions that I like to ask all of my guests, but before I go there, is there anything else about what we've been talking about this [00:25:00] morning or if we've touched on your book a little bit, harness your inner c e o, but we haven't talked really in depth on that or anything from there that you really think is important for the listeners to hear?

[00:25:10] Becca Powers: I just wanna reemphasize that you are worth prioritizing, right? And whatever it is that you're chasing today, whether it's success mission, Family, make sure you're in the equation too. And I can guarantee you that as soon as you do that, your outcomes will be far better than they are today.

[00:25:36] Scott Maderer: One of the, my brand is inspired stewardship, and one of the things that I run the lens through is that idea of stewardship and. Like some of the words we've been talking about today. It's another one of those words that I, people hear it and they think all different things in their head.

[00:25:52] That means different things to different people. So for you, when you hear the word stewardship, what does it mean to you and how has that shown up in your life?[00:26:00]

[00:26:00] Becca Powers: I was thinking about that prior to coming on here and you know what I'm really feeling called to say is that leading through example is really how.

[00:26:13] I see that for myself and then having the courage to teach, stand up and help somebody else, like I've come through a very remarkable situation where my health and my energy were at an ultimate decline. Not only did I become healthy again, but that my whole life is thriving and almost every single bucket, and I feel that from a stewardship perspective, it's, that's the gift I was given and now it's my responsibility.

[00:26:41] Give that gift to someone else. So this is my favorite question and I love asking it of everybody. Imagine for a minute that I could invent this magic machine, and with the power of that machine, I could pluck you from where you are today and transport you into the future. Maybe [00:27:00] 150, 250 years.

[00:27:02] Scott Maderer: And through the power of this machine, you could look back and you could see your entire life and see all of the ripples, all of the connections, everything that you've left behind in the world. What impact do you hope you've left behind in the world?

[00:27:17] Becca Powers: It's a beautiful and big question. Fast forwarding, I would like to leave the imprint that I have helped children have more present parents.

[00:27:31] That's really I think our kids today aren't feeling a love problem. I think they know they lo they're loved. I think that there's a presence problem because as adults we're so onto the next thing and all the things we talked about this entire interview. So that would make me feel, if I could look back on my life and.

[00:27:56] I actually helped kids have [00:28:00] present parents that would, I'd feel like my life mission was complete.

[00:28:07] Scott Maderer: Awesome. So as we close out April here in 2023, what's coming next for you on your journey?

[00:28:15] Becca Powers: Ah, so much, Scott. So I just released in March I released a workbook, which is the Workplace Burnout Workbook to get dive into that piece a little bit more, I think.

[00:28:29] I learned some feedback from my readers that they love the empowerment journey and the spiritual journey, but they're like, I'm actually still just like practically stuck in the ick. So I released that and I would love to,

[00:28:43] Scott Maderer: how do I deal with the fact that I get 2000 emails in a day? Yes.

[00:28:47] Becca Powers: So I, I released that and now that project is complete, I'm writing my second full book.

[00:28:55] Would be my third published book. [00:29:00] And just continuing to increase my reach conferences, corporate consulting gigs, everything that I can do to help people. So

[00:29:10] Scott Maderer: just more.

[00:29:15] And you can find out more about Becca over on her website@beccapowers.com. I'll of course have a link to that over in the show notes. Becca, is there anything else you'd like to share with the

[00:29:26] Becca Powers: listeners? You deserve to live a life you love, so get out there and do the work because it's awesome on the other side.

[00:29:43] Scott Maderer: Thanks so much for listening to the Inspired Stewardship Podcast. As a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you [00:30:00] enjoyed this, Please. Please do us a favor. Go over to inspired stewardship.com/itunes.

[00:30:10] Rate all one word iTunes rate. It'll take you through how to leave a rating and review, and how to make sure you're subscribed to the podcast so that you can get every episode as it comes out in your feed. Until next time, invest your. Your talent and your treasures. Develop your influence and impact the world.