Episode 819 How Do People See You
[00:00:00] Scott Maderer: [00:00:00] Thanks for joining me on episode 819 of the inspired stewardship podcast. I'm
[00:00:07] Ryan Englestad: [00:00:07] Ryan Englestad from pop psych. Oh, one-on-one. I encourage you to find health. And one way to be inspired to do that is by listening to this, the inspired stewardship podcast with my friend, Scott Maderer.
[00:00:19]Scott Maderer: [00:00:19] I have to remember that they're trying to do the best they can to navigate the situation that they're in. That they're not evil. They want to live at a good world and they want to have everyone provided for in some way, shape or form. But the way that they see us going about doing it is different than the way that I think is best.
[00:00:40] But that doesn't make them evil in any sort of way. Welcome. And thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling in the inspired stewardship [00:01:00] podcast, who will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others and develop your influence so that you.
[00:01:07] Can impact the work
[00:01:09]and today's episode about investing in yourself through stewarding your talent. I talk with you about why understanding how others see you is really important. I've talked about how it's not about any one view, but rather the pattern. And I also talk about. How it's less about what you think others see and more about what you do and say, you've heard me talk about developing your talent and what are the best ways to do that is through books.
[00:01:42] But if you're like most people today, it's hard to find the time to read. And that's why today's podcast is brought to you by audible. Go to inspired stewardship.com/audible to sign up. And you can get a 30 day free trial. There's over [00:02:00] 180,000 titles to choose from, and you can pick one and listen your way to developing your talents via audible.
[00:02:08] That's inspired stewardship.com/audible. To get your free trial and listen to great books the same way you're listening to this podcast. One of the things that Stacy and I talked about on Monday is this idea of when you find your center branch, when you think about your values, that you're rooted in that it's also important to check in and see how others see you.
[00:02:36] I've talked in previous episodes about the disc communication and personality system and how, one of the reasons why I love that is not so much about. Me understanding need just to understand me, but it also allows me to understand others and then change what I do to more closely match what they need.
[00:02:58] And I think it comes about that [00:03:00] way too, with our values and our center branch. I'm not suggesting that you need to change your center branch to match what others expect. That's not the point, but knowing how others perceive. What you do and what you say and what you believe is very important. The impression that we make on others is sometimes just as important as the reality.
[00:03:25] And I would say that there are times where our intent, what we know in our head and in our heart is what we mean by something is not the way it comes across to others. And that difference, that miscommunication, that difference in how, what we intend and what we view in others is so important to understand the truth is we never know someone else's intent, but we, because we know our own intents, we have a tendency to read into what other people do and say intent that may or may [00:04:00] not.
[00:04:00] Be there. This is why doing things like a three 60 assessment where you check in with people. In a work environment that report to you, people who are parallel or peers to you and people that you report to, or in a home environment, you check in with people that are in your immediate family, people that you interact with more as a friend or on an equal level, and then people that you interact with above and below you in different relationships.
[00:04:28] You, you check in for a variety of relationships when you're looking at how people. View you, because the truth is you're not looking for individual viewpoints. You're not looking for how this person or that person views you. Instead. You're looking for the patterns. You're looking for words that show up over and over again.
[00:04:51] You're looking for tendencies that show up over and over again. And this isn't about defending yourself either. This isn't about saying, but wait, that's not [00:05:00] what I meant. That's not how I am trying to be perceived. This is about just accepting what other people say to you or for you or about you. And then.
[00:05:11] Working not on changing how they think, but instead work on changing your actions and your words so that they perceive them differently. It's about accepting it. But to do that, you have to be able to see the pattern. How is it that most people see you? What are the words that most people would use to describe you or describe your actions?
[00:05:38] Know, there's times that I've had interactions with people that tend to be very negative. They don't see me the way I want to be seen. They don't perceive me the way I want to be perceived. And I'll tell you I'm not perfect at accepting that view. And then working on how I act around them to make sure that they're seeing me in a way that I want to be seen, not changing my [00:06:00] values, not changing my core, but thinking about how, what I do and say.
[00:06:04] Affects them and how they perceive it. Now, obviously there are some people that you may not want to change. Anything that you do because you either don't value their opinion or because the interaction with them is so one-sided that it's not worth doing because the truth is they're going to perceive you in a negative way, no matter what you do.
[00:06:25] It's possible to have people that have that kind of view on the world. But I would believe that the vast majority of people want to see us in a positive light. And so it's less about what you think you're being perceived as less about what you think is the truth and more about what you actually do and say.
[00:06:47] But I look at the environment right now around politics, around COVID around masking or not masking around opening businesses are not opening businesses. All of these sorts of things end up [00:07:00] being put out into the world by different people in different ways. And the truth is that we're all trying to do the best we can, but oftentimes it's not even listening, not even understanding that someone else may have a different viewpoint and that doesn't make them stupid, that doesn't make them evil.
[00:07:19] That doesn't necessarily make them wrong, even is hard because I'll tell you that there's people that I see their view. And I think that they are truly wrong. But I have to remember that they're trying to do the best they can to navigate the situation that they're in. That they're not evil. They want to live at a good world and they want to have everyone provided for in some way, shape or form.
[00:07:46] But the way that they see going about doing it is different than the way that I think is best, but that doesn't make them evil in any sort of way. And I think that is one of those things that we all need to keep [00:08:00] in mind to help us navigate the world, especially today, because the truth is, if we don't ask that question, how do other people see me?
[00:08:09] And is it really the way I want to show up in the world? Did remember, no matter what you say, you want to show up as you're showing up in a different way. If most people are perceiving you in that different way. Thanks for listening.
[00:08:25]thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast. As a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively. Listen. But act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you liked this episode on the stewardship of talent, you can go over to inspired stewardship.com/talent and sign up.
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