Join us today for an episode about the reason your resolution to get your money in order may be running low about now...
Today's episode is focused on figuring out the self-sabotage loop and ways to short circuit it...
In today’s episode about impacting the world through stewarding your treasures, I talk with you about why if you set a resolution about getting your money under control at New Years it may be failing soon. I share a bit about the self-sabotage cycle and why it matters. I also share why there are techniques you can use to help defeat this tendency.
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Episode 795 Why Your Money Resolution May be Failing Now
[00:00:00] Scott Maderer: [00:00:00] Thanks for joining me on episode 795 of the inspired stewardship podcast. I'm mom's waken. I challenge you to invest in yourself, invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent, your treasure is to live out your calling. Having the ability to live an unconstrained life is key.
[00:00:20] And one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this. The inspired stewardship podcast with my friend, Scott Mader.
[00:00:35] this is one of the reasons that coaching is so beneficial when it comes to hard things like getting your money in order or changing your health, because it's going to help you defeat the self sabotage cycle because that person from outside number one can bring in some newness, some excitement, some difficulty, some differences, but number two, they can also hold you accountable and encourage you.
[00:00:59] Welcome and [00:01:00] thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling and the inspired stewardship podcast. We'll learn to invest in yourself.
[00:01:18] Invest in others. And develop your influence so that you can impact the world
[00:01:30] in today's episode about impacting the world through stewarding your treasures. I talk with you about why, if you set a resolution this year about I'm going to get my money under control. It may be failing soon. I talk a little bit about the self sabotage cycle and why this matters for this kind of thing.
[00:01:49] And I also talk about some techniques that you can use to help defeat this natural tendency that we all have as we talk about stewarding your treasures. Wouldn't [00:02:00] it be great. If you could support this podcast and do it without costing yourself an extra dime. It turns out you can. All you have to do is use inspired stewardship.com/amazon.
[00:02:13] When you're ready to make a purchase via Amazon and a small commission, we'll come back to support the show. If you enjoy the show, when you're ready to buy from Amazon, just use inspired stewardship.com/amazon. So when this episode is coming out, it's towards the end of January of 2021. And one of the most common new year's resolutions that I see people put out is something about, I want to get out of debt.
[00:02:39] I want to get my money in order. I want to take control of my spending. I want to stop spending as much on eating out or shopping or other things, there's all of these goals that we tend to set at the new year about getting our money under control, getting our spending under control, stopping bad behavior we have [00:03:00] around money.
[00:03:00] Maybe getting out of debt is probably the single most common one, but we see these show up year after year. And the truth is with new year's resolutions. You might've heard, or you've probably heard. That most new year's resolutions end by Valentine's day. So we're a couple of weeks out from Valentine's day right now.
[00:03:21] And odds are really good. If you set a goal at the beginning of the year, if you set a resolution about getting your money in order, you might actually be stalling out on that. Right now, it's getting close to the end. You're getting close to the period of burning out. Maybe you haven't been as consistent with it as you would like to be.
[00:03:42] Maybe you haven't seen the progress that you'd like to say. See, maybe you're frustrated in other ways, because the truth is it's not making the progress that you want. You set this resolution, but now it's beginning to [00:04:00] falter and the truth is some of this is a natural thing that's going to happen. See, if you recognize yourself in this pattern, something comes up a new idea, a new course, a new program, a new, whatever, even a new relationship.
[00:04:18] And you've got all sorts of excitement about it. You're ready to do it. You're looking forward to it. This is going to change my life. This is the best thing ever. You've got that excitement stage. Then you begin to work on it. You begin to actually get into the relationship or you begin to spend some time on the goal you begin to follow through and maybe you're setting, you're getting up in the morning, or like we're talking about today, you're working on getting your money in order and you begin to make some progress.
[00:04:44] You put some things in place. You begin to do a budget. You begin to do other things that begin to work in the direction shouldn't you want to, and you have a certain amount of contentment about. The progress you're making you, you have a certain amount of energy because you [00:05:00] see some progress. And then what we call the drift begins.
[00:05:07] You begin to lose a little bit of excitement. You begin to maybe not quite be as consistent as you would like. Maybe you miss one day, maybe even because of something that's outside of your control. And as that happens, It gets easier and easier to procrastinate on the work. It gets easier and easier to put things off, to make excuses.
[00:05:31] And that moves us from drift to self-sabotaging behavior. This means you begin to act out in actually a way that makes the goal less likely you begin to fight against the progress. You begin to move in the direction. You don't want to go. And at that point, your brain naturally says, this isn't fun anymore.
[00:05:57] I'm not enjoying this anymore. I'm not [00:06:00] making any progress anymore. Why am I wasting time and energy on this goal when nothing is happening and you begin to look around for the next idea, the next shiny object, the next thing that's going to solve this problem. And then regret sets in and you decide it's not me.
[00:06:23] It's the chorus I bought is just no good. The relationship I'm in is just not the right person, the course that I'm taking, it's not the right one, the work I'm doing on my budget, I must not be doing it correctly. Something's just not right. And so you look for the next thing because you regret the purchase that you just made.
[00:06:44] And you find something new and you bite in on that and the excitement starts all over again. This cycle is called the self sabotage cycle and the truth is almost all of us exhibit this [00:07:00] from time to time, raise your hand if you've ever bought an online course that you thought was going to change your life.
[00:07:06] And the truth is you've watched zero or maybe one video in the course, and that's it. You've never even gone back to it. You bought it over a year ago and you've watched one thing in it. If you ever set a new year's resolution and then by Valentine's day, you weren't working on it anymore. You've fallen into this self sabotage cycle.
[00:07:28] It, we have it in all facets of our life. The truth is it's a natural human neurological condition. It happens in our brains because of the way our brains are wired. It's actually not even a bad thing. Our brains want novelty. They want newness, they want variety. That's part of what drives us. But the interesting thing is, is when you become aware of this cycle, you begin to recognize that there are ways [00:08:00] that you can defeat it.
[00:08:02] One of the surest ways is simply surrounding yourself with accountability surrounding yourself, with others who are either going through the same thing and working on the same thing, an accountability group, or maybe an expert or a coach, maybe it's finding ways to turn the process into a habit. All of these are ways you can begin to defeat the self sabotage cycle, but the first step is even becoming aware of it.
[00:08:31] By the way, this is one of the ways that we get marketed to that causes us to spend money and waste money. You've occasionally bought something and then bought something else. Because of your brain's tendency to do this very thing. I promise you that every person on the planet, then it has done that. And it's because of the way we're wired.
[00:08:54] So as you become aware of that, it allows you to begin to fight against [00:09:00] it. Some to become a little bit more forearmed and again, some of the ways to defeat it. Find an accountability group, find other people that are going through it, share your goals out loud with others because no offense, but when others know whether or not you're doing something and they have permission to call you out on it, you are much more likely to follow through with it.
[00:09:25] This is one of the reasons that coaching is so beneficial when it comes to hard things like getting your money in order or changing your health. Because it's going to help you defeat the self-sabotage cycle because that person from outside number one can bring in some newness, some excitement, some difficulty, some differences, but number two, they can also hold you accountable and encourage you whenever your brain naturally falls into the drift and the self-sabotage behavior kinds of cycles, that outside perspective.
[00:09:57] Adds value. You can also do it for yourself [00:10:00] because if you become four armed and aware, you can begin to implement some of those techniques yourself. It's harder to do, but it's certainly not impossible. And when you do that, you're much more likely to actually succeed. Thanks for listening.
[00:10:22] So much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast, as a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you like this episode on the stewardship of treasures. You can sign up for our treasures tips by going to inspired stewardship.com/treasures or text in the U S four four two two two treasures tips.
[00:10:59] And [00:11:00] we'll send you five weeks of our best tips on stewarding your treasures until next time. Invest your time. Your talent and your treasures develop your influence and impact the world. .
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In today's episode, I talk with you about:
A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other. - Anonymous
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