00:00:00 Thanks for joining me on episode 606 of the inspired stewardship podcast I met, and I'm Jocelyn from the family life movement podcast. We challenge you to find a way to balance your work and your family. And one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this, the inspired stewardship podcast by my friend Scott Mader.. Uh, there's something to be said, or Jocelyn is very good about being logical. So when we do a podcast, she's a lot better. She's doing the show notes than what I am.
00:00:45 Uh, you know, at the same time, I'm a lot better beyond on the front end. I don't get embarrassed easy. I'm not afraid to say something silly. Uh, I'm not scared of my kids that erupted me. I can still go for flow. I can pick it up. Welcome and thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship podcasts. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent, and your treasures for your true calling.
00:01:14 In the inspired stewardship podcast. We'll learn to invest in yourself, invest in others, and develop your influence so that you can. In today's interview with Matt and Jocelyn Woodrum for the family life movement podcast, I asked them about their definition of leadership. I also ask them to share their advice to couples that are working together and want to remain together. Despite that, I also asked them to share some of their own podcasting tips and how that's worked for them. One reason I like to bring you great interviews like the one you're going to hear today is because of the power in learning from others.
00:01:59 Another great way to learn from others is through reading books, but if you're like most people today, you find it hard to find the time to sit down and read and that's why today's podcast is brought to you by audible. Go to inspired stewardship.com/audible to sign up and you can get a 30 day free trial. There's over 180,000 titles to choose from. And instead of reading, you can listen your way to learn from some of the greatest minds out there that's inspired stewardship.com/audible to get your free trial and listen to great books.
00:02:36 The same way you're listening to this podcast. Matt and Jocelyn Woodrum had been married for 12 years and have three beautiful daughters and really they are. And later on you'll hear about their Facebook page. You see pictures of the kiddos on there all the time and they are acuities. They enjoy traveling while Jocelyn continues to work as a speech language pathologist. And yes, she's still working even right now during this time of covert 19. And they, they constantly move, they move locations every few months. I,
00:03:08 I joke that every time I talked to Matt, they're in a different house. Um, so Matt is at home with the girls homeschooling and at the same time they're trying to try to balance creating a business and of course maintaining their own household together. They host a podcast called the family life movement. I've been a guest on there that's focused on creating a community of family focused entrepreneurs who build profitable businesses that allow them to have a business without sacrificing their kids or their family. Welcome to the show, Matt and Jocelyn,
00:03:44 thanks for having us. Thanks. We're excited to be here. Matt and Jocelyn. So one thing that people often think of is developing their influence is being a leader. You know, last week we ended the episode talking a little bit about servant leaders. So how would you define the word leadership? I think I'm going to go back to what I said at the end of the last episode with the whole servant leadership. You have to lead by example and by allowing yourself to be humble in, um,
00:04:25 in your leadership, I guess. Um, I think that's going to be a really good, um, it's, it's, it's easier to follow somebody who is leading like that as well. I would completely agree. I love this idea of servant leadership that my college really tried to instill in us. Because, you know, you look at Jesus and he never sat here and told somebody what to do or how to do it. He went out and showed them. And in today's society, it's really easy to stand back and,
00:04:59 and had the I'm over you mentality. You know, if I'm a, if I'm a leader in my home, you know, my, my goal, my desire, my, my instruction as I understand it, is not to sit here and boss my kids around. It's not to sit here and be a dictator. Instead, my goal should be deleted. Uh, you know, my, my daughters by example. So what does that mean in our household? That means, uh, opening the door for my wife.
00:05:27 I, I'm old fashioned and that, that's actually something she told me to stop doing before, but I still do it. You know, it's about, you know, holding my wife's hand, uh, leading by example. It's about making sure I kiss my wife in front of my girls. I do that because I want them to see that I am affectionate and I love my wife no matter what the atmosphere is or if we're frustrated. One another. Uh, whenever she gets home, I try to,
00:06:01 I stand up, I give her a hug and a kiss. I do that out of respect. Uh, so that my girls know that when they're out and they're dating, they're in the dating world. They're not going to be kissing you at 30, at 30, at 35. Would you allow them today when they're mature enough to do it? So I can do a couple of things. I can either sit here and say, Hey, girls, don't get a guy like this. This is not the type of person you want to date.
00:06:30 Or I can say girls, the guy that you want to date or let into your life, he should be treating you with the same respect that I treat your mother. He should be opening the car doors for you. He should be kissing you. He should be holding you not until they're married, I'm sorry. And that's the whole thing about leading by example. It's really easy to sit here and say, Hey, you know what, don't go for this type of person or whatever. But when you go and you live that out,
00:07:07 yeah, that's what leadership means. That's what, uh, you know, taking the example that Jesus showed us, his example, uh, was all about,
00:07:17 you know, go minister and if necessary, use words like that. So we're all influences, influencers.
00:07:28 And you were just talking about influencing your daughters, uh, in, in family and business in different ways.
00:07:34 So here's the question for the two of you. Y'all are trying to do business together as a couple.
00:07:41 So how can couples that are trying to do business together actually stay sane and preferably not kill each other while,
00:07:49 while working together and being married and trying to raise ghettos all at the same time? Um, I'm going to go back to some of our early episodes.
00:07:58 Um, communication is critical. Um, something that we've learned in doing this since December is that we kind of have to put our own,
00:08:11 have our own jobs within the business. So like I do a lot of the background stuff and Matt does a lot more of the in person stuff.
00:08:21 Um, I'm a little bit better at website design and he's a little bit better at editing. Um,
00:08:27 so we, we divvy things up and I think that, you know, so I'm trusting him to do take care of that and he's trusting me to take care of my end of things.
00:08:36 Um, so that when we were trying to wait on each other, um, a lot more was,
00:08:43 it was a lot harder. Um, even though it sounds like it shouldn't be, like if he was waiting on me and I had a really long work day and the kids wouldn't sleep,
00:08:51 and so then I'm exhausted and it's nine 30 and I'm trying to go to bed and he's, we still have to do this.
00:08:56 And I'm like, I don't have the brain power to do this right now. Um, whereas, uh,
00:09:04 he, he's, yeah. Whereas if he has time during the day when, you know, the kids are having like a rest time or a movie break,
00:09:12 um, and, um, he can get, he can rock out whatever he needs to do editing wise and I can rock it out easier on Saturday morning or whatever.
00:09:21 Um, so it's just, it's just having that communication and figuring out what's working for us and it's an ongoing conversation cause like what's working today might be completely different in three months when I'm in a different location.
00:09:34 Um, and or my is different. Like right now my caseload's a little on the low side, but it could be very different in a few months when all these people are coming out of the hospitals.
00:09:44 Um, so yeah, I think that's, that's really critical. I would agree. You know, I think that there is something to be said for playing to couple's strengths.
00:09:56 Uh, there's something to be said for Jocelyn is very good about being logical. So when we do a podcast,
00:10:04 she's a lot better doing the show notes than what I am. Uh, you know, at the same time I'm a lot better at being out on the front end.
00:10:11 I don't get embarrassed easy. I'm not afraid to say something silly. Uh, I'm not scared of my kids interrupting me.
00:10:18 I can still go with the flow. I can pick it up. Um, and the reason why that's important is because I think Jocelyn would,
00:10:29 she would get more frazzled I guess might be a word. And so if we weren't playing to each other's strengths,
00:10:37 it would be so much harder to move forward. And we did have a period of time where I was frazzled cause I was trying to be not in my element in trying to do lives and things like that.
00:10:48 And that just wasn't working for me. And it was, I was really stressed. I was in tears.
00:10:52 Yeah. And I think that that comes back to Scott, one of the things I love about you and your mission and what you do is,
00:11:00 is understanding each other's personality types. As somebody who's very outgoing and stuff like that, it takes nothing for me to jump on and do a live.
00:11:10 If anything, I have to hold myself back from rambling. Uh, you know, and you know,
00:11:17 Jocelyn's comfort zone, her zone of genius isn't in front of the camera. It's not always, you know,
00:11:24 doing these different things, but instead she does a phenomenal job in the background. Or she's said he or she said any of you know,
00:11:35 funnels and helping with the website and you know, how do you word something so that it connects better with somebody.
00:11:44 And so when we play to each other's, uh, you know, zone of genius, it just seems to work out so much better.
00:11:53 So Matt and Jocelyn, you've now been doing the podcast together with the family life movement for a little while now.
00:11:59 Uh, you know, Matt, you've had a wrestling with fatherhood, also a podcast. What are some tips that you would share with folks that are interested in using podcasting as a means of developing their influence?
00:12:12 I have two thoughts initially. Um, first, um, I got this advice probably about a year ago,
00:12:19 that if you are wanting to start a business, you need to be publishing. Um, and you need to be publishing on a consistent basis.
00:12:26 And, um, we have been doing this podcast thing for about four months now and I feel like it has been all the difference in,
00:12:36 I mean, I'm not saying that we have, we have not technically even made any money yet, but it has given us a,
00:12:44 already, our platform has grown just because of publishing. Um, other tips, I'm going to put a plug in for the PR,
00:12:52 the coach that we use for our podcasting, getting it off. Um, Jamie Atkinson. Um, he has the podcast profit lab.
00:13:00 Um, and I can give you any links for that if you need it. Um, his course was phenomenal.
00:13:07 He really took you step by step through and we had a podcast launched in 30 days. It was amazing.
00:13:11 28 days I guess. Um, it's, it was amazing. Um, and I really did not think it's going to be possible.
00:13:19 Um, but again, Matt did a lot of that while I was at work, so he did a lot of that.
00:13:24 But um, yeah, it, it, that, that um, Jimmy co course was amazing for that.
00:13:33 Yeah, I would say one of the biggest things, uh, my biggest downfall when I did wrestling with fatherhood,
00:13:39 uh, was consistency. So it's really easy to say, Hey, I wonder, you know, I want to deliver value to people and say,
00:13:46 okay, I'm want to release on Monday and Friday. But what happens when those, you know, there's interviews,
00:13:52 you know, you're not in the mood to do some of those interviews or you know, you don't feel like recording on that day or you've got sick kids or something like that.
00:14:00 When you're not consistent, people don't, um, as a listener, somebody's not consistent. I notice as a listener,
00:14:13 um, and so yeah, I would definitely say like consistency is one of the biggest things I would say.
00:14:19 The other thing I would say is map out your content. So if you're wanting to drop content, if you're wanting to do solo episodes,
00:14:27 figure out exactly what line or what topic and different things like that that you want to go through. That way you're not the day of going,
00:14:34 Oh man, you know, what can I do a podcast about? Instead you're like, Oh, okay.
00:14:39 I want you, I'm going to do one on marriage or I'm going to do one. You know,
00:14:42 especially if you're doing a solo episode or a, you're doing a, an episode with your spouse. Having that direction helps to narrow down the stress,
00:14:53 especially when you're living in busy lives. So if you've ever struggled with growing your influence as a business owner while still balancing time with your family,
00:15:06 this may help Matt or Jocelyn. Would you share either a principal or a mindset or a resource beyond the family life movement podcast,
00:15:17 which obviously is a great resource. Other than that, what are some other resources that you would share with folks who are focused on doing this?
00:15:27 So, something that I've noticed as a mom, um, in trying to balance all the things, um,
00:15:37 if I am distracted in any way, shape or form, I get mad the kids get crankier. Um,
00:15:45 so really my biggest tip would be to make sure that when you were, when you were focusing on something,
00:15:54 make sure that's the only thing you're focusing on. If I am supposed to be listening to my kids,
00:15:59 read a book, um, or whatever, I need to be focusing on that, not trying to do something on Facebook at the same time.
00:16:06 Um, if I am supposed to be working on balancing the check book, I need to be focusing on that,
00:16:14 not trying to listen to the kids reading a book or whatever. Um, and I, and, and that is,
00:16:22 that is true. Like I caught myself, um, if I am really getting agitated with the kids,
00:16:28 um, it's probably because I'm trying to do too many things at once. Sometimes we have to be,
00:16:32 sometimes we have to be cooking dinner while we're doing something else or whatever. Um, I've also noticed that,
00:16:40 um, with my kids, and this might be different for other people's kids, but for my kids,
00:16:45 I've noticed that if I spend, you know, give them really dedicated 20 minutes, you know, sometimes they'll give me a few minutes to get something that I need to get done.
00:16:54 Um, but I need to give them their time ahead of time, especially since I'm still working and they don't see me all day,
00:16:59 every day. I find that that, so this morning I, we're recording this in the afternoon and I spent the entire morning with the kids very undivided to as close to an invited as I could.
00:17:11 Um, and with the exception of the baby, the older girls are fine with that right now. Normally they would be all a crawling all over me.
00:17:19 Um, if I hadn't done that. So I think that was really critical. Yeah. The baby doesn't count.
00:17:23 Baby babies, babies, babies want your time no matter what. That does change eventually, but it takes a while.
00:17:31 Yeah. Yeah. I would also say, you know, for me like I've got add, I've got,
00:17:37 you know, the, the learning disabilities, I've got tests that tell me I've got add like crazy.
00:17:43 Um, but the one thing that's really helped me as a, as a stay at home dad is,
00:17:48 you know, homeschooling these businesses up and going and stuff like that is making a list. What I do is I write a list and I write a list of three specific things that I want to get done for the day.
00:18:03 Now, because I'm a stay at home dad, I usually do. I usually have five or something like that,
00:18:07 but I have a line on that list. I need to get these three things done today. Here's how much time those three things should take me.
00:18:16 I have a course that I want to be watching me that should take me an hour. I need to spend,
00:18:22 you know, a half an hour explaining homeschooling stuff to our girls. I need to spend, you know,
00:18:28 I'll spend a half an hour working out. Now, once I'm done with those three things, there's specific things.
00:18:35 I draw a line through those items. There's something psychological that happens when you actually cross something off of the list that said,
00:18:42 just erasing it because you see that you've accomplished something. It's building up momentum. Now, once you get those three things done,
00:18:50 I would encourage you to go ahead and write three more things. The other thing that I would say is that you have to be okay and allow time for chaos when you have it.
00:19:01 You know, especially when you have young kids, when you have a young daughter, when you have,
00:19:04 you know, we have, uh, three girls, 75 and 21 and a half months. You have to allow time for thanks to mess up.
00:19:13 So when you don't get all three things done on your list, that's not a slam against your character or anything like that.
00:19:21 But that night, take some time, say, okay, what is it that I, what did I get done?
00:19:26 Awesome job. What did I not get done and why did I not get it done? Maybe you need to go down to two or even just one thing on your list that Jocelyn working 10 hour days,
00:19:37 she does not have a three or a five item list when she gets home. Her list is usually East supper.
00:19:43 I spend a half an hour to an hour with the girls and then it's usually about bedtime and then she spends a couple hours with me.
00:19:50 So I would encourage you to figure out what works for you. If all you've got 30 minutes to figure out what is the best way to use that.
00:20:00 30 minutes is not going to be to write a three or five thing list. Instead of write one thing down that you can realistically do 15 to 30 minutes and then accomplish that.
00:20:13 And as you get through those one or two items, then you can get to the point where you add an extra item to it and then you can do and be more productive.
00:20:23 And that, you know, that's, it's something I've been working through myself and, and stuff like that.
00:20:28 But he'll figure out what works for you and then execute the plan. When he was saying that, that actually reminded me of like when I was,
00:20:39 um, when our oldest was a newborn and I was home with, you know, I literally had one task that I wanted to accomplish for the entire day and some days that was just getting her to fall asleep in her crib.
00:20:55 And then other days it was to get dishes done. Um, you know, and, and a load of laundry exactly like I,
00:21:04 and, and I think that was it that kept me sane and it was a weird time for us cause I was actually job searching.
00:21:10 I had, I had lost my job is a long story. Um, and so I was job searching too.
00:21:15 So filling out one application, um, you know, it was, was on that list, that list.
00:21:21 And if I had tried to do any more than that, I think I would have been even more insane.
00:21:26 So yeah, knowing yourself, knowing that the life situation that you're in is really critical in knowing how much time those items take.
00:21:35 So if you've got 10 minutes, that's probably not a good time to bring up the budget with your spouse and want to sit down and have a family meeting.
00:21:45 You probably want a couple more minutes for that. Or starting at 10 o'clock at night when I'm trying to get up.
00:21:50 Exactly. So, you know, instead if you've got 10 minutes and you know, Hey, you know what,
00:21:55 there's five minutes worth of dishes and then go do the dishes. Small things, small things. Because as adults,
00:22:05 none of this stuff is real, real small. But like figuring out, know yourself, know what it takes you to get things done,
00:22:13 how long it takes you to get and moms, it's not going to get all done in one sitting.
00:22:19 That's something that I really had to struggle with. It's okay to break the tasks up and it's taking,
00:22:26 you have a sink full of dishes. It's not going to take you, you know, an hour it's going to possibly more,
00:22:34 um, the dishwasher's broke it or whatever. So sometimes what should be a 10 minute task isn't all day tasks,
00:22:41 but it's not because of it. It's not because of the task. It is not because you're a failure,
00:22:46 it's because you've got other stuff. Again, if you have an infant at home getting a load of dishes done as an all day job,
00:22:54 yeah. Yes, absolutely. It just, yes, you can find out more about the family life movement over@familylifemovementdotcomandyoucanfindthatcommunityoveronfacebookatfacebook.com slash groups family life movement.
00:23:11 You can find all of the social media links and all of that stuff over on the website as well as that great free download,
00:23:17 so thanks for much so much for coming on the show today. We're having a lot of fun. Thanks for having us.
00:23:23 It's great fun. Thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast. As a subscriber and listener,
00:23:39 we challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen, but act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling.
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00:24:16 Until next time. Invest your time, your talent, and your treasures. Develop your influence and impact the world.