Join us today for a special rebroadcast of Part 3 of the Interview with Darryl Lyons, author of "18 to 80" and co-owner of PAX Financial...
This is Part 3 of the interview I had with speaker, author, and small business owner Darryl Lyons.
In today’s interview with Darryl Lyons, he talks with you about developing your influence. Darryl shares with you his definition of leadership and what it means. Darryl gives you his best tips on how to grow your influence and how to develop a tribe. And we talk about how our internal money story affects our relationship with money.
Join in on the Chat below.
00:00:00 Thanks for joining me on Episode 5 86 a special rebroadcast of Episode 2 56 with Darryl Lions brought to you because of these uncertain times and Darryl's take on investing and looking for the future. It's fresh and different, and I wanted everyone to have a chance to hear it again. I'm Dara Lines, author of 18 to 80. I challenge you to invest in yourself, invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent and your treasures toe. Live out your calling.
00:00:34 Having the right behavior with your money is key to doing that, and one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this. The inspired stewardship podcast with my friend Scott mater. I think that it's just so awesome to see that there's such a hunger for leadership in a hunger for somebody to provide direction. And so what did? The things I'm suggesting to answer Your question is, and I think we have to embrace our authenticity, who we are not worrying about trying to be somebody else. Welcome.
00:01:17 And thank you for joining us on the inspired stewardship podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be. Then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling. In the inspired storage of podcast, you will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others and develop your influence so that you can impact the world. In today's interview with Darryl Lions, he talks with you about developing your influence. Darryl shares with you his definition of leadership.
00:02:03 He gives you his best tips on how to grow your influence, and Darryl shares how story affects our relationship with money and lots more. One reason I like to bring you great interviews like the one you're gonna here today is because of the power in learning from others. Another great way to learn from others is through reading books. But if you're like most people today, you find it hard to find the time to sit down and read. And that's why today's podcast has brought to you by Audible Go to inspired stewardship dot com slash audible to sign up and you can get a 30 day free trial.
00:02:42 There's over 100 and 80,000 titles to choose from and instead of reading, you can listen your way toe. Learn from some of the greatest minds out there that's inspired. Stewardship dot com slash audible to get your free trial and listen to great books the same way you're listening to this podcast. He's an Arthur, a personal finance expert in an ambitious entrepreneur. Darryl Lions knows what it means to run a business and to live in the middle class. Now he's ready to help you achieve the dream of financial freedom so you can enjoy life.
00:03:20 Darryl San Antonio, Texas company packs Financial Group is a Inc 5000 fastest growing company and the best place to work. They're also a company that I work with. His work and his passion have allowed Daryl Toe also give back to his community, earning him the praise of the likes of Dave Ramsey and San Antonio Mayor Julian Castro. Darryl also helped establish a Eurasia award called The David Robinson Award that recognizes an athlete in Eurasia who shows character and athletic excellence. And Daryl's latest mission is to help redefine retirement, where we no longer think of retiring but rather pivot into the next chapter of life with purpose.
00:04:08 This idea is rooted in thousands of one on one conversations with people about money in the study of behavioral finance. Welcome to the show, Darryl. Thank you for having me. I'm I'm excited to have a conversation with you. Absolutely. And just to clarify When I said I work with packs, I'm one of y'all's clients. So I I appreciate you coming on as a guest. Ah, as opposed to just talking to you like I do occasionally as a client to you have some unique insight, don't you?
00:04:38 Yeah. I've seen both sides of your business, which which helps one thing that people often think of as developing their influence is being a leader. So how do you define leadership? No, really. Leadership is Tim, to me is translating a vision into reality. And and that's the best definition of ever seen in leadership. There's like you've probably read a ton of leadership books, but it's the reason that's important is because it starts with a vision. You have to have a vision of where you're going.
00:05:18 And we've heard in the scriptures that without vision, people perish. And so, as as a business owner as a leader.
00:05:25 You have to have a vision of where you're going in it. And if you don't spend time, um,
00:05:31 first of all, spent time, the word because, uh, it's sharper than a two edged sword,
00:05:37 And fear of the Lord is beginning of wisdom. So I hang out in the word of God a lot because actually,
00:05:43 I'll tell you also this when I'm worshipping God, I get visions From what? What? What the future looks like.
00:05:50 Now you say, Well, that's kind of okay. I mean, I'm not talking about hokey visions.
00:05:53 I'm just talking about ideas that popped in my head when I'm worshipping the Lord. It's amazing. So I spent some time.
00:05:58 I spent some time in the word of God I spent spent time worshipping him, and I often time to get a vision of of where we're going and it's amazing,
00:06:06 and it makes sense. It's not like even hard to digest. It just makes sense. And so I would not discount the supernatural in the in the idea of embracing a vision.
00:06:15 So if you're struggling with vision, spend some time with the Lords who it happens, test him in that area.
00:06:20 It's it's pretty remarkable. The other time is it's been some time in the industry whatever industry you're in,
00:06:26 get in industry groups and read stuff in the industry and try to get an idea of what trends are happening.
00:06:34 And I think as a leader you've gotten you gotta have a pulse of where the future, what the future looks like then crystallizing that vision which always has a degree of discomfort and risk and translating that into reality,
00:06:48 figuring out what steps are gonna take to get there and then executing those steps consistently, I I say that leader is a chief reminding officer,
00:06:58 always reminding people, this is the vision. This is where we're going. This is why we're doing what we're doing.
00:07:03 And so ah, a simple definition but complexity and it's in the implementation is ah, leader. Leadership is trans translating a vision into reality when someone really wants to grow in influence water one or two things that you suggest they focus on doing or learning.
00:07:29 Yeah, So, um, if you know if they want Oh, many times people want Oh, um grow,
00:07:37 grow it A TRIBE. We've heard tribes and have a TRIBE. People that follow. There's Ah, I find that there's a lot of a lot of amazing people out there now that are that have tribes and many of,
00:07:54 um it's so crazy. Many of them are ill equipped or not good communicators or don't have talent and it,
00:08:04 you know why I'm saying that is because it's cool because I can relate. I think that it's just so awesome to see that there's such a hunger for leadership and a hunger for somebody to provide direction.
00:08:19 And so what are the things I'm suggesting to answer? Your question is, as I think, we have to embrace our authenticity,
00:08:26 who we are not worrying about trying to be somebody else. If you're not a good communicator, improve on the skill set you have.
00:08:34 I mean, there's a certain there's a certain standard of competency in every field, so ghetto level of competency,
00:08:41 but be who you are, I said, Um, I used to spend a ton of time listening to a Max Lucado and Avery Aunty speak.
00:08:49 I would capture their every move, the way they articulated words and how they communicated on stage, and they're very different.
00:08:57 But But I spent countless hours because I could repeat a lot of their sentences that I spent less time hearing them and more time watching them.
00:09:06 But I got to the point saying, you know, God made me completely different. Now I'm gonna take a few nuggets from them,
00:09:10 but I'm just gonna be me. And so one of the things I would just encourage you. It's just a just to be who you are.
00:09:18 And then secondly, find a space. That a problem. You know, I don't ever like I don't prefer somebody having a solution Looking for a problem.
00:09:28 I've got a solution. You know, this is my solution, and I'm gonna go find problems out there and try toe solve it now,
00:09:34 find a problem and and be authentic in the desire to solve that problem. For people the by product and the scale in which you saw that problem is not that import.
00:09:49 If you're called to solve a problem that has a small scale, then you're called to serve a small community.
00:09:56 If you're called, if you're called to serve him solve a problem that has a very wide marketplace, then that's your role too.
00:10:03 But we all have our roles. But don't try to solve a problem that you're not called to solver or have a solution and try to solve problems.
00:10:09 Just find something that bothers you. You know, the the author of Home The Gospel He said, Lord,
00:10:16 break my heart for what breaks yours And if you pray that prayer Lord, just break my heart for what breaks yours and something breaks your heart And it could be human trafficking Or it could be substance abuse.
00:10:27 If that breaks your heart than hang out in that space, try to solve problems and just be yourself,
00:10:33 Carol, I think that all of us have an internal narrative, an internal story and dialogue when it comes to money.
00:10:43 Do you have any advice on how we can use that that money story to develop our influence and our behavior around money?
00:10:54 Yeah, we do all have money stories and many of them We have to. I think first of all,
00:10:57 we have to ask ourselves, Are they right? You know, we were all raised with care. Most of us were have parents or a parent or ah,
00:11:06 grand parent or whoever. And they and we were we have neither observed. Very few of us actually were taught about money.
00:11:15 Let's be riel. Many of us just observed it and then we created truce about money. I think it's very important week now in behavioral finance.
00:11:25 We call these heuristics or rules of thumb, and it's and they were routed and how we were raised.
00:11:31 And we've got to start with, you know, these things that are that I thought were true. Are they true with money?
00:11:37 Because, you know, I was at a sprint store the other day. I had to get a new phone,
00:11:41 and the lady was telling me about all these accessories to get how they were on sale, and they normally don't have him an inventory.
00:11:48 This is a great time to get it. And I go, You know, I it's $99. I could just use the ear buds that come with the with the phone,
00:11:55 and I don't need any extras or anything because, well, these were hardly in, and they're, you know,
00:12:00 they're $20 off. People wait for these. Well, I know, but I don't really need it.
00:12:06 And she goes, Well, you only live once. Okay? so I thought about that for a second.
00:12:11 She was nice person, probably 24 years old. That was her. That was her bias, right?
00:12:18 That was her rule of thumb, because the complexity of thinking about money does require a brain to hurt sometimes,
00:12:24 and we burn calories, thinking about it. We don't want to burn calories, thinking about money. So we lean onto these rules of thumb and heuristics and they misguide us.
00:12:33 And so I think it's important for us to say, you know, these rules of thumb that either I've heard.
00:12:38 But, hey, you only live once or even commercials. You even get influenced. There's a Coke commercial now that says,
00:12:45 Just be you. Well, we take that and we apply that as a za mantra for our decision making.
00:12:53 Just look, I'm gonna buy this because this is just me. So it's really, really, really important to say my money True is that I I manufactured that are part of my life story.
00:13:03 Are those really true, or are there better ways to make these decisions like a better rule of thumb might be based on my past experience?
00:13:13 Is this a wise thing to do. That's a better question to ask, then just be you based on my desire to leave a legacy.
00:13:20 Is this a wise thing to do? Oh, here's another question. How will this impact my future self?
00:13:28 Or how would this impact others? Or what are the indirect consequences of what I'm about to do? So those air better questions to ask.
00:13:37 And there's a rule of filters that I've created. There's about 10 filters in the book, 18 to 80 that I've created to help people make better decisions rather than ones that they were raised with.
00:13:48 That might be wrong, and so I think it's really important to take inventory of your life story and the money stories that you've heard and make sure they're accurate and they're wise.
00:13:59 So, Darryl, earlier you were talking about watching Dave Ramsey and Max Lakota and other speakers and kind of trying to learn from them.
00:14:07 And, of course, you've had opportunities to do public speaking. So do you have any tips for how people can develop their influence through speaking?
00:14:18 Yeah, So, first of all, I've really come a long way for speaking. I mean, I I'm still not you know there's money came from trembling hands.
00:14:27 Tiu. Now it's just sweaty Paul's. So that's why I've come a long way. And sometimes people ask when they say,
00:14:35 Man, you're just it's so natural for you. And I go, Holy cow. I was scared out of my blue jeans doing this and thank you.
00:14:42 Uh, but you know that the question is a twofold question. So how to develop your influence requires you to be good.
00:14:51 You know, I think I have some degree of skill set in there. The best thing you could possibly do to develop your skill set public speaking the best thing.
00:15:00 And this is from John Maxwell, Not me, is preparation. And I know that sounds overly simplistic,
00:15:05 but you really got to prepare. Um, when I was first Artie, public speaking, um, I was so bad that I would spend countless hours practicing the presentation over and over and over again,
00:15:18 so I might present it 10 times because I just didn't want to mess up so that that preparation, the idea preparing has really continued,
00:15:28 and it does take effort. But if you prepare, you find yourself in the midst of the hiccups you can move on and move through now.
00:15:38 As a result, you still have to find places to speak. And certainly the podcast community is one of the best places because many podcast host there's thousands and thousands and thousands,
00:15:50 and some are good and some are bad. I Scott, I'm not patronizing, but I wanted things I love about yours.
00:15:55 It's just the branding of it, messaging and the organization. It's really beautiful, but there's a lot of them out there that are not that good.
00:16:01 But many of them will will, What a guest. And so if you wanted to kind of get a practice,
00:16:06 you could get on a lot of podcasts shows. But that still might not do a good job because your community of influence might be local.
00:16:14 And so often times I've gone thio. I've gone to community leaders, and I've I've said I I've sat down with them and I'll tell you about those two leaders In just a minute.
00:16:28 I sat down with them and told them the message that I'm trying to portray, But it's mainly mainly the problem I'm trying to solve,
00:16:35 so I might say something like, you know, I'm really concerned about people in the decisions they're making behaviorally with their money right now.
00:16:43 And I have a message to share with them about how to solve that problem. And I'd like to share that with your And if the that problem resonates with their community,
00:16:54 they'll have me on and that you could go to local news stations. The morning shows like Great Day s A.
00:16:59 And San Antonio are many others. They're looking for speakers. So they say that your problem is authentic and you can communicate that the solutions to their audience,
00:17:08 they'll have you on chambers as well They'll have. Maybe not the main chamber stage, but maybe a little committee.
00:17:15 They might have you in there. And then, of course, local churches. Many local churches are looking for,
00:17:21 uh, uh, people to come in and speak to their small groups to kind of break up the monotony of a small group and speak if if you have a problem that can help help their small group.
00:17:32 So you do have to be diligent in this space, and you do have to make a lot of mistakes.
00:17:36 You have to fumble, but but really The key is, is preparing your message and then going out to you know whether it's chambers,
00:17:43 churches or podcast host and even morning talk show host those four on and kicking the tires and getting rejected and then keep pushing.
00:17:51 Keep pushing through that. Yeah, John Maxwell is one of my my mentors. And I've had the pleasure of being in a small room where there was only,
00:18:02 you know, a few of us and John after a speaking event and getting to sit down and actually have a a fairly intimate conversation with them and one of the things I challenged him.
00:18:12 Honest. I said, You know, John, if you go read all of these books on how to speak and what to do and all of this sort of stuff that you get up on stage in front of 5000 people and you break every single rule said,
00:18:26 How do you do that? He said. I have prepared and delivered hundreds of thousands of speeches. I get to break the rules now,
00:18:37 you know, and it's just that epiphany of Oh, you got to get good. First I get it,
00:18:44 you know it. Spend the time to get good and then you can break the rules. It's great point.
00:18:49 Yeah, because I can use, you know, my oftentimes I'll use in presentation strategic, us and arms and Snowden and I have to do in the right context.
00:19:01 But my my staff will catch me now because they they oftentimes will be a good critic for me. They say I like that stutter.
00:19:08 It looked like you were trying to create a degree of authenticity to your presentations. That yeah, thanks for catching that.
00:19:13 So, yeah, he I could see that, and that's fun. I can't believe he could pull it off.
00:19:17 That's like the, uh, the Nirvana is public speaking to be able to do that so well, I mean,
00:19:22 it's amazing that he does. He's these brilliant man. Yeah, if if you haven't watched John speak,
00:19:29 go on YouTube and find, you know, some of his presentations and he's just he's masterful at communicating and and he's somebody I greatly admire in that area.
00:19:40 The other trick I've done on I've shared this before on the podcast, but I'll share it again because it's relevant.
00:19:45 Tow The conversation we were just having is I actually like going on YouTube and finding people delivering speeches in languages I don't understand.
00:19:55 So like someone delivering a speech in Korean and I will watch the speech and listen to the sound. But I literally don't understand a single word they're saying and you know,
00:20:05 subtitles or turned subtitles off and what I'm watching. The reason I do that because I want to hear inflection.
00:20:11 I want to hear tone. I want to see body language. And I can do that in that context,
00:20:16 without worrying about trying to process content, if that makes sense. So it's a way of watching how someone speaks without getting cluttered with what they're saying.
00:20:25 That makes sense. It's very cool. Yeah, I get that So you can connect with Darryl by following him on Lincoln as Darrel W.
00:20:35 Lions. And just because he's got a couple of unusual spellings. Darryl is d a R R y l and Lyons is L Y O N s.
00:20:47 And so that's Darrel W. Lions or on his Twitter as Pac's financial group with the group is G R P.
00:20:56 So that's packs financial g, R P at Facebook Packs Financial Group, and you can also find Darryl over at his website.
00:21:04 That's kind of the home base, and you can find links to all of this. Of course, in our show.
00:21:07 Notes over It inspired stewardship, but his website is pax financial group dot com. Darryl, is there anything that you'd like to add?
00:21:16 Yeah. So I set up a link for your listeners Packs financial group dot com slash inspired. And in that leak,
00:21:26 there's, uh I have a video that will inform you of whether or not Social Security will be there.
00:21:32 Um, I have a 40 point pivot checklist as well, and so you can find that there. And we should also,
00:21:38 um, have a link. If we don't have it up, let me know. But we should have it out by the time you get on there,
00:21:45 because my next book, 18 to 80 will be out, and you should be able to grab it on there.
00:21:51 But if not, you'll be able to get it on Amazon. Just searchin 18 to a t t 0 18 to 80.
00:21:57 Um, and that's a helpful resource for you as well. Thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast as a subscriber and listener.
00:22:14 We challenge you to not just sit back and passively listen. But act on what you've heard and find a way toe Live your calling.
00:22:24 If you enjoyed this episode, please, please do us a favor. Go over to inspired stewardship dot com slash iTunes rate all one word iTunes rate.
00:22:39 It will take you through how to leave a rating and review and how to make sure you're subscribe to the podcast so that you can get every episode as it comes out in your feet until next time investor time,
00:22:53 your talent and your treasures develop your influence and impact world way.
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I think that it's awesome to see such a hunger for leadership and people to provide direction. I think we need to embrace our authenticity, who we are, not worry about being somebody else to develop our influence. - Darryl Lyons
You can connect with Darryl using the resources below: