Episode 1219: Feeling Worthless

[00:00:00] Scott Maderer: Thanks for joining me on episode 1,219 of the inspired stewardship podcast.

[00:00:06] Joshua Johnson: I'm

[00:00:07] Joshua Johnson.

[00:00:08] I challenge you to invest in yourself, invest in others, develop your influence and impact the world by using your time, your talent and your treasures to live out your calling, having the ability to find your purpose and calling is key.

[00:00:23] And one way to be inspired to do that is to listen to this. The inspired stewardship podcast with my friend Scott Maderer.

[00:00:32] Scott Maderer: Working the way it's supposed to, again, pay attention to what you have, not what you don't have, and then recognize that it's okay to have negative feelings from time to time. That, that, that moment of difference, that moment of contrast is actually a good. Because it helps you recognize the good times, even more welcome.

[00:00:58] And thank you for joining us [00:01:00] on the inspired stewardship podcast. If you truly desire to become the person who God wants you to be, then you must learn to use your time, your talent and your treasures for your true calling in the inspired stewardship podcast, who will learn to invest in yourself, invest in others and develop your influence.

[00:01:20] So that. Can impact the word

[00:01:24] in today's episode about investing in yourself through stewarding your talent. I talk with you about eight reasons why you might feel worthless. I share six questions to ask yourself when you feel that way. And I also share 11 things you can actually do. If you feel worthless, you've heard me talk about developing your talent.

[00:01:44] And one of the best ways to do that is through. But if you're like most people today, it's hard to find the time to read. And that's why today's podcast is brought to you by audible. Go to inspired stewardship.com/audible to [00:02:00] sign up and you can get a 30 day free trial. There's over 180,000 titles to choose from.

[00:02:07] And you can pick one and listen your way to developing your talents via. That's inspired stewardship.com/audible to get your free trial and listen to great books the same way you're listening to this podcast. Feeling unworthy, feeling worthless can happen at any time in your life. It can be triggered by a lot of different things.

[00:02:34] Oftentimes as an adult, we struggle with our self-confidence and we struggle. Other people telling us that we aren't worthy and then having feelings around these things that make us feel like we're really not all we should be. We're not all we stack up to be whether this is imposter syndrome, whether this is just a feeling that [00:03:00] others don't value us, whether it's a feeling that we don't value ourself, it shows up in a lot of different ways and a lot of different times in our.

[00:03:10] I think many of us struggle with this from time to time, I'm not talking here about feelings of depression. And by the way, feeling unworthy can be a signal that there is a larger problem, like depression or other health issues. I'm just talking about those normal feelings that we get from time to time.

[00:03:32] Here are some of the things that can happen that might trigger that feeling. the first and most obvious is if people around you, especially people, you value people who you feel connected to people who should be loving on you and love you, tell you that you're unworthy. It does happen that there are times that people around us are telling us we're not worth anything.

[00:03:58] And often [00:04:00] when that happens, we begin to internalize it. We begin to feel that. And if this is something that's happening in your life consistently, then there's a larger problem. When others around you are tearing you down. Similarly, the second area is if we tell ourselves that we're not worthy, if we tell ourselves that we're no good.

[00:04:23] If we tell ourselves that we're not good enough, if we have thoughts in our head that are the kind of things that we would not say to our friends, but even more, we probably wouldn't even. To our enemy, then this is a problem and you need to get into, why are you telling yourself these things? Why are you saying these negative scripts?

[00:04:44] Is it something that comes from the past or is it something that you are dealing with and need to get some help with a third area? If you lack resilience? We all have times that we're just gonna feel down in the [00:05:00] dumps. We just feel a little overwhelmed, feel stressed out, feel exhausted, feel tired, feel sick, whatever it is we feel down in the dumps about things and how long that lasts.

[00:05:14] A lot of that has to do with our resilience, our ability to bounce back from challenges, our ability to move forward when things. not what they should be when things aren't as good as they should be when we're struggling with those things. It's our ability to step forward from those things and overcome those setbacks.

[00:05:37] And if you don't have resilience and you've not developed resilience, then that can be an area of struggle for you. Similarly, the fourth one, if we're in this constant state of comparing our. To others, if we're comparing our journey, no matter where we are in that journey to other people's journey, if [00:06:00] we're constantly trying to keep up with the Joneses, so to speak, if we're constantly trying to say I'm not good enough because I don't have X, Y, Z, or w, or this is not going on in my life, or this hasn't happened yet for.

[00:06:15] Or whatever it is that comparison trap can lead to feelings of worthlessness. And then fifth, if you've gone through a time of change or trauma in your life, whether that's a significant grief. Whether that's an emotional time, whether that's a change in job, a change in relationship, anything that has caused a massive shift in your life can often lead to at least temporarily feelings of worthlessness.

[00:06:48] The sixth one. If you begin to feel like others are against you. If you begin to feel that the world is out to get you, that other people are acting [00:07:00] or feeling a certain way about us, especially when they haven't expressed that in any way, shape or form, they've never said anything that would indicate to us that's actually how they feel.

[00:07:13] Instead, we've put words in their mouth. We put ideas in their mouth and we begin to feel this way, despite any sort of evidence. And the seventh one, if we have negative thoughts and feelings and emotions, all of the time, again, I'm not talking here about feeling negative about something temporarily or every once in a while.

[00:07:37] I'm talking about constant feelings of negativity, constant feelings that everything is wrong. That there's no we're doing those peas. Permanent pervasive. And personal all of the time. And then I mentioned the eighth one at the beginning. It might be an indicator that there's a larger problem, a health [00:08:00] issue, or a mental health issue of some sort that you need to get some follow up on.

[00:08:06] You could be suffering from depression, you could be suffering from other health or mental health issues. These are eight things that can trigger those feelings. But what do you do about. When you feel it, what do you do when you feel those moments of worthlessness? The first thing is you wanna ask yourself the following six questions.

[00:08:30] The first one, is it really about me? In other words, is it really personal? Is it really something that has to do with you and what's going on with you? Or is this something that's bigger or different than. next. Do you focus on what you have or what you are missing? It's about this feeling of gratitude for what you have next is this action or this activity, or this [00:09:00] thought, bringing me closer to what I want from life, or is it moving me away from it next?

[00:09:06] What will it take to love me? In other words, what will it take for you to feel worthy? Can I just let it go. Is it something that you can let go of, or is this something that you need to get some help dealing with and processing? Is it something that's more big than that? And similarly, is there something or someone I need to forgive and by the way, that might include forgiving yourself.

[00:09:35] And from that, you can go ahead and recognize that when you're feeling worth. You need to think about

[00:09:42] the

[00:09:42] Scott Maderer: actions that you can take. You can step forward and recognize that the truth is if you're doing activities, if you're out there in the world, if you're making a difference, then you're going to be vulnerable to this feeling.

[00:09:56] And that includes recognizing that you are where you [00:10:00] want and need to be. We often think that our bad feelings, we need to just cheer. It's possible that right now you need a little bit of time to just feel bad and there's nothing wrong with that. As long as it doesn't last so long that it keeps you from moving forward, you need to zoom out and step away from the moment where you're in and look at the bigger picture.

[00:10:26] Look at the bigger reality, recognize what you have and what. Don't have, because the truth is this feeling is temporary. It won't last forever. And it's important to recognize too, that everyone, even the most successful people feels this way from time to time focus and identify the things that are working in your life.

[00:10:52] What is going well? What is actually. Working the way it's supposed to, again, pay attention to what you have, not what you [00:11:00] don't have, and then recognize that it's okay to have negative feelings from time to time. That, that, that moment of difference, that moment of contrast is actually a good thing because it helps you recognize the good times, even more.

[00:11:18] You wanna spend some time and energy identifying your gifts, identifying what you're good at, identifying what and who you really are because when you become more comfortable in your own skin, then it's easier to recognize your own worth and recognize. This is okay. It's okay to do the deep work. It's okay to examine the deep feelings.

[00:11:45] It's okay to push yourself. Even if that makes you feel negative, because the truth is having emotions, being who you are, knowing how you feel and being aware of that is actually a [00:12:00] superpower. And then out of that take a moment to breathe, to lighten up and to recognize it's a process, not an.

[00:12:08] Everyone has moments like this from time to time and it's okay. As long as they don't last too long. It's okay to feel it today. Thanks for listening.

[00:12:20] Thanks so much for listening to the inspired stewardship podcast as a subscriber and listener, we challenge you to not just sit back and passively. But act on what you've heard and find a way to live your calling. If you like this episode on the stewardship of talent, you can go over to inspired stewardship.com/talent and sign up.

[00:12:48] For our five week series on the stewardship of talent, or if you're in the us, you can text 4, 4, 2, 2, 2 talent tips. That's [00:13:00] talent tips to 4, 4, 2, 2, and get those tips until next time, invest your time, your talent and your treasures. Develop your influence and impact the world.